Thanks for the additional information. It is helpful. You probably do spoil her a bit, but that is pretty normal. First off, you need to get her off the settee. Dogs should not be allowed on furniture as it makes them think they are the boss and allowed to do what they want when they want. Just keep a leash attached to her and every time she goes to jump up, give a short tug to get her attention and a firm low toned NO. Soon she will learn that she isn't allowed up anymore and will not even try. When she does that, reward her with a tasty treat like a hot dog (vienna sausage) sliver or liver slivers. This helps naturally keep her more submissive and less demanding.
I'd get her neutered. If she goes into heat before spaying you lose some of the benefits or spaying such as reduced chance of breast cancer.
Start obedience training in earnest. Classes are great, but you can start at home. The following site is helpful for teaching you how to train your dog. Be sure and click on the link to the page on obedience at the bottom. and links on subsequent pages leading to detailed instructions.
Training works best if you train at least 30 minutes a day (two 15 minute sessions). I would start making your dog work via the Nothing in life is free program (NILF). It is outlined below.
Training and nilf program all help a dog learn that they are lower in the pack than the humans and the humans make the rules.
I've never had a problem with dogs sleeping in the bedroom as long as they are on their own bed or crate and not up in bed with the humans. Of course, they have to be well behaved in the crate and not carry on. Perhaps they were just concerned over you sleep since it is harder to sleep if a pup is whining and crying in the same room .
For the whining and crying, the only thing that works is to totally ignore the behavior. Each time you get up and let the dog out to eliminate or pay the dog any attention including yelling at the dog, they are rewarded for the behavior because they either get out of the crate or get attention.
I do recommend some changes to your routine with her that will help. First feed her the last big meal at around 5pm and keep a little aside for a small snack meal right before bedtime. You also want to take up water at the same time so she has plenty of chance to empty her bladder and bowels before bedtime. You should also take her for a long walk (30-45 min) before bedtime. Make it a fast paced walk with the opportunity to eliminate before you come in if she hasn't already gone.
Next buy a kong toy. Fill it with peanut butter or yogurt early in the day and then freeze it. When you put her in the crate, give her the kong with frozen treat. These things will tire her out so she sleeps sounder and longer. The kong will either keep her away a few hours longer before going to sleep thus keeping her asleep longer or will give her something to do if she wakes up in the night time. If she has something in her mouth she isn't whining.
Invest in a good pair or ear plugs or head phones and start this on days where you don't have to work the next day. In my experience, it usually only takes a few days before they learn that whining no longer has the same response from you. Now the first few days it may get even worse as they are just convinced you can't hear them or something, so stay strong and ignore it. I've had clients that plugged earphones into their TV so they could better ignore the pup. The pups learn though.
Dogs get bored with the same toys all the time, so only give half of her toys and rotate them each week. You also might try a DAP collar. They emit a pheromone much like the one a nursing mom emits to calm her pups. It is helpful for cases where dogs have separation anxiety.
I hope this information is helpful to you and you are satisfied with my response. If you would like any additional information or have more questions please don’t hesitate to press the reply to expert or continue conversation button so I can address any issues you still have.