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Ask Clare Your Own Question

Clare
Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 33297
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
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My ex husband is threatening to take me to court to rule that

Customer Question

My ex husband is threatening to take me to court to rule that I have to travel 140 miles round trip and meet him half way between our homes to see his children. He moved to Southampton following our divorce. My children live with me in Leicestershire. Can he do this?
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare and I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
How old are the children and what contact do they have with their father
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.


Hi Clare,


 


They are 7 - Jude and 8 Olivia.


 


He has seen them on a reguar basis up until recently. He cancelled the last but one visit (which was his son's birthday) and last week refused to collect them this week when I refused to meet up due to financial reasons


 


I have never said he couldnt see them, just that he collects them himself.


 


Melanie

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
How long ago did he move?
Are you willing to offer any compromise?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Hi,


 


 


He moved nearly two years ago.


 


I am not in a financal position to cover the travel cost. We have been compromising for two years and it is no long viable. It all came to a head when he moved an arranged time which resulted in me losing a booking for work to the value of £250 and then cancelling his visit for his sons birthday five days beforeha because he girlfriend had moved in with him and her belinging were in the childrens bedroom.


 


Melanie

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi Melanie
Did he move away for work?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.


Hi


 


No he chose to move back to Southampton as this is home town ahis Parents live there. He was born in Southampton and I was born in Leicestershire. We met when I lived in Southampton but we moved to Leicestershire after our children were born.


 


He did start to pay a contribution toward my petrol costs but we have suggested that after losing work (Im a self employed Bridal Hairstylist)he uses this for a overnight stay in a Hotel as he can not drive here and back in one day.


 


Melanie

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Sorry - had you been doing part of the journey in the past?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.


Yes. Up until the losing of a booking due to him changing the time of arranged time. We as a family are struggling financially and with the cost and time scales of the travel we had to make the decision that we could no long do this. Us being myself and my Fiance.On on occasion it took me 8 hours to return home due to accidents the M1


 


We have explained all this to him in July and he agreed to collect and return them to their home.


 


Melanie

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
How long have you been sharing the travel?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Approximately two years

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
What was the actual problem that caused the loss?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Hi


 


He changed the original arrangements and I had to try and rearrange an appointment which lost the booking.. He changes most arrangements.


 


Kind regards


 


Melanie

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Were you collecting or delivering that day?
Or did you do both half way?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.


Delivering and he returned them on their return home


 


This doesnt cost £22 per message does it?


 


Melanie

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
If your ex applies to the court it is indeed likely that you would be ordered to once again take a share of the transport arrangements.
HOWEVER a set pattern of contact will be established and if your ex wished to change those arrangements you woudl be fully entitled to say no - so that no repeat of what happened to loose you money you could ill afford to loose.
In other words your ex is likely top find the outcome much less acceptable that you would
So not the best of news - but hopefully also not the worst - please ask if you need further details
Clare
PS - not it is not £22 a query that would be appalling
Customer: replied 3 years ago.


Clare, No not the best outcome. But if thats the case then I shall have to deal with in and make sure that to arrangements dont get change and are at times that are convenient to me so not to affect my work.


 


It does however seem unfair that he should make things difficult and effect our lives down to his repeate selfish actions.


 


Thank you for your help


 


Melanie

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Basically IF he goes this far AND the court agrees (neither are guaranteed) then he will not be able to change arrangements - and if he does you will be entitled to simply refuse
Clare

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