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Ask Clare Your Own Question

Clare
Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 33326
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
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hello Im a single mother of 3 sons and my question is for

Customer Question

hello

Im a single mother of 3 sons and my question is for my 2 younger sons who are 20 and 12. they share the same father.

my oldest son was born in 1993. I stayed with his father until he was 1yrs old and left him because of violence. my ex hardly saw my son maybe about 2-4 times a year. i stayed on my own and he never paid any maintience. then in 2000 he said he wanted to give things another go. he was working and he had brought his own house. i moved in with him and i paid the mortgage with him for 5 months, i was working and i was also paying for food. he was paying the house bills.

it never worked out and he was being violent again and he made it clear he didnt want me and the kids there. when i left, i was very depressed because i had put money into the house and also moved in with him.

i didnt realise i was pregnant with my younger son, i came back to derby, my home town and tried to re build my life. i claimed CSA for the children as he was working, and he owed me £3500. he never paid it me because he got someone to phone the csa with my details and said that we had come to a private arrangement. he then stopped working in 2002 and he never paid me anything.

he had a house he was living in and claiming benefits.

the csa paid me ad-hoc over several years about £10 for both boys and now only £5 for one child.

i then saw a solicitor in 2009 because my ex was not living in his house and had moved back in with his ex wife where she lived. he was getting his mortgage paid and he was also getting his benefits paid.

so the solicitor made a claim under the childrens act to make a lump sum payment from the sale of his empty house.

i paid for a solictor as i was working, he got legal aid, whilst the case was going through and by now i had paid for a barrister, my solicitor asked my ex for his utilities bills as we didnt believe he lived there and if he did live there with his son from his previous marriage the solicitor said that it would show that he was using the gas/electric/water in consistant to 2 people living in a semi-detached house with 3 bedroom.

my ex never provided the bills, instead he moved his ex wife and her two children and himself back into the property. it was a this point my solicitor said that it going too be difficult now as he had moved in children and a judge would be reluctant to move him out with children.

i had also got a private detective involved in the case ( at the request of my solicitor ) who provided statements from neighbours to say that my ex was hardly ever in his house. the detective also watched my ex at his ex partners house and the PD said he was at the house all the time and not at his own house.

so after spending almost £1500 i was not any closer to resolving the issue and in the end had to give up.

it was at this point that my csa stopped and i was told he was not claiming benefits any more. so i though he was working, but he wasnt.

about 1 year ago the csa started to pay me £5 a week Child Support from my ex.

He owns his own house which is worth about £280,000.000 and he has a mortgage of about £30,000.00. He owns a 2008 megane car. he is currently building an extension on his house, he doesnt work

I own my own house, my mortgage is £94,000. my property is worth £135,000 and I have a secured loan of £17,000 on the property. I have a 2004 peugeot car. I cannot afford an extension or a bigger house or a bigger car.

I dont understand what I can do, I was not married to him, do my children have no legal rights over what they can or cannot get from that man.

he must have in money only every spent about £200 on the children in presents and the only other money we have ever had from him has been the CSA money.

please advice me
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Please can you confirm that he is in fact now currently living at his property
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Yes he is living at his property now, he moved back in when I challenged that the property was empty and he was not utilising it. I was told by my solicitor that he could be made to sell the property and he would still have enough money once he paid off his remaining mortgage to pay me money and buy himself a smaller house.

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
How much did you pay towards the mortgage?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Hello


 


I remember paying about £800 towards the mortgage for about 5 months and I was paying about 70 a week towards food a week.


 


Manjit

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Is that £800 a month?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.


Yes it is

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
What application did you actually make last time and how was it ended?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Hi


 


The last application I made, I made under the childrens act.


 


I didnt persue it because my then solictor said that had my ex not moved back in the house, the judge could force him to sell the house and pay me for the upbrining of the children as he didnt work and couldnt pay child support and he also had all the equity in the house.


 


But because he moved back into the house and when my solictor asked for previous years utilities bill and whos names they were in, he provided a new utility bill through his solictor and he also didnt provide any other proof.


 


it was then that my solictor said to me that I may not win the case because the judge would look at things differently because he had moved in and he had children living with him.


 


I did say to my solicitor at the time, he has only moved in so that he doesnt have to sell the house and he wont have to give the money for his children, wont the judge see that he is playing games. my solictor said maybe the judge may or may not see this but it was a gamble.


 


I feel that he has cheated my children


 


Thanks

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Did your solicitor discuss with you the £800 a month you had paid towards the mortgage?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Hi


 


No she didnt, she did say that I didnt have any proof because I gave him the cash

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Do you have any evidence at all of his having the money?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.


No, I am sorry, I dont have any evidence of this at all

Customer: replied 3 years ago.

No, I am sorry, I dont have any evidence

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
The only option that is left to you is a financial claim on the property relating to the money that you paid.
At best it would be a small claim - and if you have no evidence of the payments then your chances of success are slim.
I am afraid that the only right the the children have is to be maintained from his Income - no more and no less.
I appreciate that this is not the answer that you wanted - but sadly it is the law as it stands
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Can the children no make a claim from him?


 


It just does not seem fair that I have raised both boys on my own with little or no support from him.


 


He choses not to work so that he doesnt have to pay any maintenance, which is something he stated to the boys and to me years ago.


 


I feel as though he has stuck to his guns and not worked.


 


I am not saying the children have missed out they have had a resonably good life with me as I have always worked and they have had holidays etc.


 


But I am so annoyed that he can have two childdren, never provide for them. live in a 250,000 house and only have 30,000 or so mortgage to pay,he is sitting on all that equity and yet he wont work and the children are not provided for because he doesnt have an income


 


Where is the fairness of the law?


 


Can my children make a claim from him? as independent people?

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
I am afraid that there is no claim any of you can make unless he has an income.
If he dies without making a Will then the children will share the estate with any other offspring that he has
Clare

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