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Clare
Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 33517
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
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My ex has refused to hand our daughter back to me after contact

Resolved Question:

My ex has refused to hand our daughter back to me after contact , 4 times now ,each time I have called the police when they come he hands her back he says he does not want my father at hand over it is on the court order for him to be their. she is 2 years old . He also has signed an undertaking to be conciltory to me at hand over but he points shouts at me making me feel vulnerable. I'm frighten to take it back to court what can I do?
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare
I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
Why do you not wish to take it back to court when he is clearly breaching the order?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
We have been in and out of court 7 times the judge said which ever parent bring it back to court she will give the other parent residencey I'm so scared, tired and drained my baby is all I have I'm so scared. His layer has sent a letter saying they was not aware my dad was on the court order [he has been on all 7court order to be their because of the dad's unpredictable behaviour and threading behaviour to me. ]they want to sit round the table to decuss it ?I don't know what to do? My dad has had the police come round Wednesday and told him that the dad has made allegation that my dad has been harassing him and hostile they said they can't do any thing because the dad has no evidence . My dad is so upset all he wants is for us both to have contact with our baby but the dad is now making these allegations ,I I just don't know what to do for the best. Right our wrong I have been voice recording our hand over because of the way he is with me my dad says nothing at handovers he sstands on the side walk whiilst I go to the door my dad can see and hear every thing .im so desperate I'm a good person ,I never stopped the dad from seeing our daughter I always follow the court orders but he break them all the time like this weekend he but in the communication book he wanted our daughter sat,sun and mon usually friday, sat sun but on Tuesday he decided he wanted her Friday sat sun mon he was supposed to give each other 2week notice he gave me two days that's just one of many he does I'm so sorry another sleepless night woke up feeling very vunrable jo
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
When was the last hearing and what was it about?
What is the contact actually meant to be?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
October2013 it was a finale hearing he has contact Tuesdays 9am-5 pm and every other weekend 9am Friday to 5pm Sunday he collects from my house with my dad their and we collect from his at 5pm
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
October2013 it was a finale hearing he has contact Tuesdays 9am-5 pm and every other weekend 9am Friday to 5pm Sunday he collects from my house with my dad their and we collect from his at 5pm
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
What is the extra contact about - you said he wanted her an extra day.
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
It's about holidays I have to give him 2weeks notice if I want to take her on holiday it's worded the parties agreeing that the mother wants to take her on holiday for a week during term time they shall re arrange the fathers Tuesday contact for another day and the father shall not unreasonably withhold his consent so long as mother has provided at least 14 days notice of her intentions similarly should the father wish to take her away for extended weekend contact the mother shall afford him the same flexibility on the same terms
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Thats fine.
What does the Order actually say about your father?
clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
The material grandfather or the mother shall collect from the respondent father house. The maternal grandfather assistance at handover will come to an end as soon as the parties are ready.
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Are you willing to attend Mediation?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
At the final hearing I suggest ed mediation caffcc and lawyers said it was a good idea he agreed but soon as we got out of court he said he would never go to mediation with me.On Tuesday hand over again he refused to handover our daughter I broke down the police officer asked him could I go inside as it was cold and I'm upset he said no she can stay on the doorstep I stayed with the female officer who tried to support me. Whiles he went to get her. His solicitor wants to sit round a table as they was not aware my dad was on the court order, I don't know if to do this ? He does frighten me their was DV in our relationship I never told anyone until our daughter was born and the health visitor picked up that things wasn't right, she was 5 months old one day I broke down and told her every thing she called the police, he had left the family home before this and I didn't take it further because I thought he would leave me alone.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
At the final hearing I suggest ed mediation caffcc and lawyers said it was a good idea he agreed but soon as we got out of court he said he would never go to mediation with me.On Tuesday hand over again he refused to handover our daughter I broke down the police officer asked him could I go inside as it was cold and I'm upset he said no she can stay on the doorstep I stayed with the female officer who tried to support me. Whiles he went to get her. His solicitor wants to sit round a table as they was not aware my dad was on the court order, I don't know if to do this ? He does frighten me their was DV in our relationship I never told anyone until our daughter was born and the health visitor picked up that things wasn't right, she was 5 months old one day I broke down and told her every thing she called the police, he had left the family home before this and I didn't take it further because I thought he would leave me alone. I will go if it will help ,I have read about it.
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Why exactly does he refuse to hand over the child - what excuse does he give?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
As I have said he does not want my dad at contact
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
And that is it?
Is there anyone else who would be willing to be with you?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
No my mums not allowed my brother work my friend s work or don't live near by and who would want to do this 4times a week for the next few years.
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
I suggest that your write to his solicitor and send his/her a copy of the Order highlighting the reference to your father.
Point out that because of his client's behaviour you need someone with you and there is no one else who will assist.
Point out that he is also breaching the order with regard to giving notice.
Say that unless this stops you will return to the court for an enforcement order - but that you will attend Family mediation first provided it is with mediators who do shuttle mediation.
Do NOT worry taking it back because of this behaviour by him will not make the court cross with you
Please ask if you need further details
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Sorry I have been ill the doctor has put it down to stress iv lost a lot of weight and not sleeping. Thank you I'm frighten to do it as I don't feel strong any more I'm going back to court my legal aid has come through I just pray too god he doesn't get residency what do you think will happen?
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
No I do NOT think this will happen.
I think that you were frightened by what the Judge said - BUT he or she did NOT mean you to be treated in this way by your ex
Clare
Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 33517
Experience: I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
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