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Ask Clare Your Own Question
Clare
Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 34589
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
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Me and my husband looking at divorce after 4 years of marriage.

Resolved Question:

Me and my husband looking at divorce after 4 years of marriage. We have a 5 month baby and he threatens for full custody. Currently I live in the house I bought in sole name in June 2012 and paid mortgage and bills till I went on maternity. The husband began spouse maintenance at this stage to January 2014 (around 6 months) but moved out in February 2014. Now threatens to take baby and house when I've worked hard to have what I do and I'm a good mum. What is likely to come from this for him?
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare
I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
How much is the house worth and how much is outstanding on the mortgage?
Who currently has the day to day care of the child?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Current value is approx £85k, I have full day to day care of the child
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Sorry missed this, this house has £53k mortgage remaining.
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
How was the original purchase funded?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
I paid the deposit with. Savings, and borrowing funds from family which I have repaid now and paid monthly mortgage till sept 2013 when I went on maternity.
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
On what basis does he think that he would be able to remove the child from your care?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Not too sure, he's not interested in baby's welfare. It's more a competition for him, if we not together and baby with me, he just wants to take her from me to get at me. He wants to prove I am mental or physical towards baby, when this is clearly all made up. My records show that, GP midwife or health visitor would notice if I was unfit? He thinks if he got baby automatically he will get house. He is a compulsive liar and makes threats when things don't go according to him. I had him cautioned from the police as he threatened to take baby away and hurt me.
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Please try not to worry - nothing that you have said makes it likely that this could happen
What contact does he have with the child at the moment and what income do you each have?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
I am on SMP till June and then likely to be on benefits short term till I get support with childcare if I go back to work. The husband is currently on £25k a year. This year including my SMP I earned £20k. But I was made redundant in Dec 2013 whilst on maternity so don't have a job to return too. He does not have any contact with child currently, I have offered supervised contact and he said no to this. Now wants to fight for full custody so he feels he in control. More than anything else, I am concerned for my baby.
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Have you offered contact at a Contact Centre or supervised by a family member?i
Is he actually able to care for the child?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Both but I would prefer via the contact centre. He wants to take baby away and her on his own, he is capable of anything so I won't agree to this. He is threatening for full custody. No he isn't very good with her, he's never looked out for her or helped out or taken care of her. He is like a stranger for her and she doesn't settle with him. He never managed a hour with her and if she cried or needed a change or feed he would wait for me to deal with it. So I can't trust him to take care of her
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Please stop worrying
Given all that you have said there is no question of your ex being able to remove the child from your regular care unless you do have a provable problem with drink drugs or violence - which clearly you do not
You are sensible in offering contact starting at a Contact Centre so that he can learn to care for the child
You can offer to discuss matters with him using Family mediation (www.familymediationhelpline.co.uk) to arrange matters
Even if he were capable of caring for the child the best he might get would be a shared care order - and you would remain in your home.
He does have an interest in the Matrimonial Home but the short length of the marriage and his lack of financial input makes his claim small - maybe 10% of the equity at best
I hope that this is of assistance - please ask if you need further details
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Thanks. I don't drink or use drugs so he wanting to accuse me that I am violent. He hurts himself and takes pictures? I am not with him and do not know where he lives so how can this be possible that I have attacked him. He has threatened to go any extent in lying to take the baby, even if he has to show I am mentally ill or violent towards him. If I was, then I would clearly have a criminal record or others would know it. What happens if I don't sell the house, would he still be entitled to the 10% or whatever may come out for him? I think this is unfair as I paid the bills, food and mortgage as well as the deposit on property so if he made spouse maintenance payments for 6 months is that something I would have to repay? I believe the child is unsafe with him so shared care would not be an option till she older.
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
It is simply not that easy for him to do this - the court will not believe him - and he has to show that you are a risk to the child and not to him so all of this is empty threats
IF he is granted a share of the equity it would not be payable until your child is 18
Clare
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