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Kasare
Kasare, Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 204
Experience:  Solicitor, 10 yrs plus experience in civil litigation, employment and family law
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Hi. I am worried that my mother has been misdiagnosed with

Customer Question

Hi.

I am worried that my mother has been misdiagnosed with a life threatening disease. I would like her to see another doctor for a second opinion. I can't speak to her as my father has taken over total control of her life and he will not allow communication between us. He controls her entire life and she has no means to ask for help. My father is refusing her any medical treatment. He will not allow my mum access to any doctors. I want to help but am being accused of being mentally ill, I am not, making it difficult to get the help I need for my mum. From what I can see, my dad does not want the best for my mum. I want to go and collect her and bring her home with me so that she can get the help she needs. My dad will try to stop me. I am terrified for her safety. Should I phone the police, even bough I have no concrete evidence? Should I go to their home and literally fight it out with him? The rest of my family do not support me on this, I am alone.
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare
I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
How old is your mother?
clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
72
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
Have you spoken to Social Services?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Hi Clare


 


Yes I have contacted Cambridge Social Services via email twice, also Bristol social services twice as I was concerned that Cambridge may not take my complaint seriously. Cambridge social services have not responded. I am intending to contact them again today, via email again but also over the phone. I was waiting to give my father a bit of time this morning in case he changed his mind regarding the best solution to the family issues we are faced with. If however social services are unwilling to help, I am then faced with not knowing what to do next.


 


Freya

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
What makes you believe that the diagnosis is wrong?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

The symptoms do not match the description of Progressive Supranuclear Palsy (PSP), but do seem to match the symptoms of Parkinson's. Now I may be wrong, but even if I were she is also not getting the right treatment for PSP, nor has she been given access to living aids. She has been cut off from most outside communication, isn't seeing a doctor on a regular basis and I feel is being denied the support she needs. My father isn't coping with the situation and is abusive toward her when she is most vulnerable, e.g. after a fall. My concern is that at the moment he is not best placed to provide care for her as he has control, trust and aggression issues. My mother is unable to ask for any help due to him not allowing her any private communication, she is now also no longer able to walk away from him when he becomes abusive and I have seen her visibly shaken after an attack. Now I understand that the behaviour of my father has its foundations which is why I have been so reluctant to involve social services. However I think the life of my mother has become at risk and so I have no alternative. My father at this point will be even more stressed and angry than normal which means he is even less capable of caring for someone who needs as much support as my mother currently does. They are intending to go abroad on the 16th, so in three days time and I simply do not think it is appropriate. I have explained all of this to social services and they have not responded.

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
May I ask why your other family members are not willing to assist?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Hi Clare

Good question. Unfortunately it is one I can't answer.

Freya
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
Have Social Services actually visited your mother?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
No, they have completely ignored my correspondence. The Cambridge police did visit
but are now claiming ignorance and are lying to me. I have contacted them on a few occasions now but they never get back to me when they say they will.
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
Have you spoken to her GP at all?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
I have written to her GP stating why I thought it was an incorrect diagnosis but heard nothing back. This may be due to patient confidentiality but I would have thought given the circumstances that some contact to say whether I am completely off the mark re the diagnosis would seem appropriate. Now my mum has told me she doesn't want to see 'her' GP, but that sounds to me that she might be willing to see someone else. I had hoped for her to come to Bristol and see my GP, Dr Hellings, in whom I have complete faith. As it stands I have contacted my mums GP, her neurologist, the PSP Association help line, a PSP association nurse directly, dr Selina Wray -an expert in PSP and Parkinson's, my GP. Family members, extended family and friends, my parents power of attorney lawyer. None will discuss. No one has said I am wrong except my sister, which means it is hard to let it go.
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
Where have they gone on holiday?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
They have gone to France, in the Haute-Provence area or nearby. That was their original plan but I'm not sure what was booked in the end. I think for two weeks.
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
When did you last see your mother?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Hi Clare
30th March 2014.

Freya
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
You have said that your father is not allowing her access to medical assistance - when did she last see a doctor - do you know?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

I think I mentioned her last appointment was in February, it was in fact on 20 January 2014.


 


Freya

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