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Clare
Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 34586
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
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My ex is threatening to take me to court for custody of our

Resolved Question:

My ex is threatening to take me to court for custody of our son. Since he left he has had access and call the house whenever he wants to speak to our son. Our son who is 5 has started saying he doesn't want to see daddy which my ex blames me for. I also have 3 other children for a previous relationship which also live with me, what should I do thanks
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare
I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
Which part of the UK are you in
What is the actual pattern of contact meant to be?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
I'm in Buckinghamshire and from the start the arrangement has been every other weekend which I haven't stopped or changed thanks Helen
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
So in fact despite what he says the child still goes for contact?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Yes my son still goes but doesn't stay over at the minute. As he gets upset but I still make sure that he try's to spend some time with his dad even if it just going to the park etc. my ex doesn't like it that our son doesn't wAnt to spend the whole weekend with him and his new gf. I have never stopped access and never will I know it's important for my son to have a relationship with his dad. My ex is blaming me for our son not wanting to stay instead of looking at his actions ie introducing his new gf telling my five yr old that's his step mum thanks Helen
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
How long has he been in the new relationship?
Whose choice is it that your son does not stay - yours or your ex's?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
The new relationship has been since January and my son told his dad he didn't want a sleepover so his dad said he would just take him for a few hours, I had packed his over night bag ready for him to stay over. He bought him back early as apparently our son was rude to the gf and his dad asked him if he wanted daddy to pick him up again to visit and he said no. My son has been going every other wkend and has even been on a holiday for 4 days with them but since the holiday he has not wanted to go to his dads or speak on the phone to him thanks
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
I understand that - but has your ex chosen not to collect him and keep him - or have you said he cannot do so?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
My ex has chosen not to keep him over night I have never said he can't have him, I have also agreed with access even when he has wanted to change a weekend dye to work etc
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Provided you have never prevented the contact from happening you have nothing to worry about in terms of any court application
It is clear that you are very committed to contact and that it is your ex who is struggling with the entirely normal comments of a child adapting to new family relationships.
Your best way forward is to continue as you are doing and making your son available for overnight contact at the usual times - it is up to his father whether he take sit up or not (when I say making available I do not mean sitting on the doorstep!)
You should also offer to discuss matters with your ex using Family mediation - and possibly also refer him to this website
http://theparentconnection.org.uk/
I hope that this is of assistance - please ask if you need further details
Clare
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