My wife and I decided to divorce and we have agreed between ourselves all aspects including custody, finance, visitation etc... What do we need to do to legalise this so that no one party goes back on the agreement? we want to avoid the lengthy and costly court proceedings which will affect the children.
eldest is 8.5 yrs old, youngest is 5 years old - we both take care of the children.
However, my wife last evening has asked me to expedite finding a studio flat (and this is in her own words "as far away from Reading as possible") for an initial 6 months.
The reason she asked me to search is that I will be paying for her rental studio flat, and she wants it done quickly as she is contemplating leaving the country to Egypt.
Right now aside from this I'm looking for a baby sitter who would take care of the children from the moment they leave school "3:15" until I return from work "4:30" after which I will manage their cooking, studying and generally look after them...we've been sharing that already so it's nothing I haven't tried or done before.
I may ask my mother or sister to stay with us o give the children some additional comfort, but I'm leaving that now until I see how things progress.
Can you please advise on the original question ?
Thank you - I have a few questions in relation to the above:
1) how do I initiate a financial court order?
2) do they normally accept what is agreed between both parties?
3) I understand about the children,and it makes sense, in the end if they grow older and decide that they want to live with their mum and she asks for it as well - then I will not prevent them from that of course, but how do I put that as an agreement ? or is it usually understood that when children grow their needs change?
4) The main question is if we agree on the parenting plan, can either party renege on that agreement and drag the other through courts to get the children? I really want to avoid putting the children through any court proceedings and try and get everything agreed beforehand as much as possible of course ?
may I also add - that after giving the parentingplan website a quick look , it is not a legally binding agreement; like I said we have and are happy with our own arrangements, what we want is to formalise it, is there a process like the one you suggested for finance that would seal parental responsibility and custody agreements etc... ?
So if I understand this correctly - as there is no dispute it is sufficient to just detail our plans as you suggested; and if there is any dispute in the future then the plan will be taken into account but ultimately the children's best interest will be the major deciding factor ?
In regards to (1) is there no statement where both parties simply want to seperate? there is no adultery, or unreasonable behaviour that either of us want on the record ?
In regards to (2) If both parties are happy with the agreement, even if it is unfair to me - for the sake of argument - why would the court object ? if I insist on the terms both parties agreed on can the court force an arrangement neither of us are happy with ?
Thanks for clarifying - just two more questions ! sorry if I want to get this crystal clear first.
1) We do want a divorce, but the reasons just don't apply - meaning, we just want to divorce and there is no adultery and no unreasonable behaviour we want on record - how do we go about that, the only reasons available on https://www.gov.uk/divorce/apply-for-decree-nisi are those...or am I missing something?
2) Fair enough in regards XXXXX XXXXX fairness - how do we know what a court will deem fair and what it will deem unfair?
OK - got that....
Now to go ahead, I have to download the decree nisi form send it to court on the basis that she doesn't want to defend it - do I need to involve a solicitor? what about my ex does she need to involve one, or is it sufficient that once receives the document she signs it and we're done?
To finalise the divorce, I got the below from the government's website:
Do they have to see the plan that you advised me to form up? and us listing who has custody ?
Getting the decree absolute
The court will check that:arrangements for children aren’t a reason to delay the divorcetime limits have been metthere are no other reasons not to grant the divorceThe court will then send you both a decree absolute.Once you get the decree absolute, you are divorced, no longer married and free to marry again if you wish."