HI. We have been married since August 2008. We got married in south Africa, outside of community of property, with accumulation of assets. As SS have instructed that I am not allowed to live in the same house as my child I have had to move out, so my wife has day-to-day care of our child. This is not due to my choice though. I was not given a say in the matter. We have just our furniture and my wife has the proceeds of the sale of a property she owned before we got married. I have debt on an argos store card (about £1600). My wife currently has no income as she is studying the ACCA exams. I earn £31868 a year.
I have permanent headaches. If, when I broke my leg in 4 place scores 10 for pain, then I usually (on a normal day) have a headache ranging from a 4 - 6. 2 - 3 times a week it goes to 8 or above. Two Saterdays ago I was looking after our child while my wife went shopping. I had an 8. I had to change his nappy and he was screaming his head off. Not good. He was also rolling around and generally making it very difficult to get a new nappy on. Due to the stresses in the house as well as having had an extremely stressful time at work since January, I swore. I didn't swear at him, but I swore while working with him. I also said: "If you keep this up I'll tape your legs to the table." Not the nicest thing to say obviously, but there also no way in which I would actually do that. It was just one of those stupid things you sometimes say but have no intention of doing. The child is 10 months old anyway and wouldn't have understood a word of it. My wife came back just as this was happening and took everything absolutely literally. That was the Saturday evening. On Sunday I went to church and she asked if I wanted to take him with me. That meant me and him being out of the house and away from her for around 3 hours. She didn't come along. Monday came and there was no problem. Tuesday night when I got home they were both not there. I thought she had gone to visit a friend. By 20:00 I started getting worried and tried to get hold of her on the phone. No luck. By 00:00 I reported them missing to the police. The next morning I found out that she had "fled the home" and was in a "place of safety". She then obviously painted the picture just as she wanted the SS to see it and they decided that I am a danger to my child. Hence their involvement. I received no cooperation from anyone that week in trying to speak to them and only received a phone call from them at around 16:55 on Friday afternoon. I was on the phone at the time and only saw I had a call when I had finished, after 17:00. They close at 17:00. So the first anyone in the SS heard my side was on Monday morning, nearly a week after she had "fled the home".
I do not believe she really thinks I'm a danger to our child. I think she is simply laying a game in which she totally discredits me, in case I were to apply for custody.
Who? The SS have spoken to me once and have had no further contact with me. Everything else has been through my wife. Initially I was allowed to visit my son (last week) three times a week for one hour under supervision. She apparently saw an solicitor at the Willow Centre yesterday and as a result I can now only see him every other Saturday for two hours at a play centre. I've also had a call from people who arrange maintenance to try to set up a direct debit for that. I have no problem paying maintenance for my child and have asked them to send me all the information so I can take whatever action I need to in order to do that.
Apart from this I'm not aware of any further actions that have been taken.
Yes. They said unless my wife felt it was appropriate I shouldn't be alone with him and that they would be advising her against it.
Yes. I moved out of the rented house (I'm on the tenancy for that) and in to a shared apartment.