We lived together in Milton Keynes, where Emilie was born. She then moved to Northhampton after separating and then to London (50 miles away) in 2010. I have since moved near Reading which is a marginally shorter distance of 40 miles. Then a bit closer (Colnbrook) but it did not work out because of the cost of rent and my job issues. So now back near Reading (Wokingham) She recently at the beginning of mediation kept complaining about me moving 22 miles further, but it is still a shorter distance & time than her move. The mediator was quick to tell her she moved and created the distance first.
I am happy to have her in the holidays! But anything over my holiday allowance I can't spend quality time with my daughter as she would be in child care for 10hours per day, and that is not a sufficient replacement timewise for the lost weekends as I will see her for 3 hours a day (morning and 2 hours after pick her up from childcare), versus the full weekend I had with her before.
It is not all about money but this is why my ex says I must have her half school holidays to deal with childcare costs. It was not an issue before for her! I would pick up the costs plus my maintenance would go up and I fall in a lower bracket. So it will cost me about £900 for her forcing these changes on me, where I'm loosing out on the time I used to have with my daughter.
This is why I think her hubby is involved. To be fair is neither here nor there, just very disappointed in her selfish controlling behaviour.
My daughter has been with me this week and is due to be picked up in half an hour, she (without any coaxing/interference) has said she wants to stay! So she will not like the weekend changes one bit! When she caught wind of change she point blank told her mum she wants weekends with dad.
Friday from 5-6pm to Sunday 5-6pm (the ex has always dropped our daughter off and I returned her on Sunday, however in June she gave me a weeks notice and said she will not be dropping off anymore, so have to get the partner to do it as she has the car if I want to see my daughter).
Oh they did speak to me 3 weeks prior to the due date saying moving forward will have to be Sat morning drop off which I refused (as that takes 40 nights a year off me). My partner then asked my ex's husband what is work said about flexible working so he could be home for the new child whilst our daughter is dropped off. They had not explored any option that would not impact me. They came back and said his work had agreed to flexible working and it was fine other than a few late drop off's until a month an half after the baby was born. They made no attempt to discuss any changes until weeks before the due date!
Funny you should mention that, that is the reason my ex gave for telling me I must have her school holidays (although her husband has never taken holiday for my daughter and they still have another child who will need child care).
we spend most our holidays together so that means no time off together! So not really an option. I can pay for child care, just don't think 10 hours a day is fair for our daughter and don't think it should count as my time with her as my ex says she does not count the weekdays she spends with Emilie as time with her (she works during school hours).
My main question is based on the fact I had my daughter so much since we seperated would I have a case to fight for more weekends? I think offering her 18 (from 12) was fair particularly as she will be working Saturdays!
I was also after an indication of court fees if not settled via CFCAS (or similar).
I can't allow her to demand and dictate and control things like she is!