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Ask Clare Your Own Question

Clare
Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 33324
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
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Hello, It's a complicated story. My partner had an affair

Customer Question

Hello,
It's a complicated story. My partner had an affair six years ago. As a result of that he had to move out of the house which he was paying for; however me and our son stayed there. I didnt have a job so he eventually took my son away with him so I could get a job and build a career. I did this successfully; however time went by and never took our son back. They lived near by so it was ok. I dont know how I allowed it. His girlfriend used to not allow me to talk to him. We lived in London. Anyway, one day he decided to move to Cornwall. He gave me 3 weeks notice to agree and then he took our son with him. The plan was that he will bring him back to me on two weekends a months. However that is not happening. I am having to travel for 12 hours every weekend. He doesnt have a job and lives in family home. He smokes weed and doesnt not look after our son well. Calls me and tells me how he is going to tell our son what a horrible person I have been for not supporting him; when in fact he was the one who took him away in order to provide a better life but now he wants me to pay for it. I want my son back. I worked very hard even though he was the one who took him away from me.
Thank you
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare
I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
How old is your son?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

He is 9.

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
When did the move to Cornwall take place
What holiday time do you have with the child?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

They moved last year so over a year now. I had him for half term and try to go there every second weekend.

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
is your son happy there?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

He is.

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
So what do you wish to change about the current arrangements
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

I want my son to come back to live with me or to put a formal arrangement in place to ensure his farther drops him off once a months and he brings him up the way I want him to bring him up i.e education, healthy diet etc.

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
Have you spoken to the school?
Are there any issues with his education?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

hi,

No, there arent any issues with his education.

Thanks

Inga

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
I am very sorry but if your son is happy there and is doing well at school then I am afraid
there is no basis on which the Court will agree that he should move to live with you.
Having said that you can reasonable expect your ex to help with the travelling for contact - and to have your son for as much of the holidays as you can get time off for.
You shoudl try and discuss these issues using Family mediation
www.familymediationhelpline.co.uk
If this fails then you will need to apply to the court for a child arrangement order to deal with those points
I am sorry to give bad news - please ask if you need further details
\Clare

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