Thanks for your response. Prior to my separation I frequently spent time alone with my son - I took him swimming and trampolining for instance.
A couple of catalyst events happened this year - me and my son were in my flat together and I unusually had a seizure when I was sitting on the sofa with him. My son was not hurt, he took a telephone and called his Mother, who came to the flat and my son let her into my flat.
The next week I was due to meet my son and had a seizure prior to meeting him; the paramedic who picked me up from the town centre took me to my son's to appologise to him as it was not appropriate for me to take responsibility of him.
It is highly unusual that I have a seizure during the day; even more so that I have two so close to each other.
Good luck and best wishes,
p.s. my son is more likely to be injured by my ex-wife's driving or the behaviour of some of the people who my ex-wife gets to look after my son.
p.p.s. Up until recently I have been an Higher Education Lecturer - now I am setting up my own digital business.
Thanks for the quick response. In theory probably, I guess it is just the the principle.
My parents and family live in Wales and the west country; I am in Ipswich.
For quite some time me and my ex-wife had an agreement where by I spend time with my son in the company of someone that wife arranged (usually a student of hers - Clarissa). Clarissa has recently started a job in Top Shop and has gone to College. I never had a seizure in the company of Clarissa.
I guess it is the principle. I am not a heavily disabled or dangerous person. I could arrange not to see my son on a day that I have had a seizure (over 90% take place whilst I am asleep).
When I have spent time with my son and another person; whether that be my ex-wife, my mother in law, Clarissa or one of my ex-wife's friends - the quality of my experience has been far poorer than if I had been on my own.
My son loves me and I love him. My ex-wife has not had a Father live with her whilst she grew up ( he is in Spain) and she has been affected by just having a Mother.
If legally there was no other option in the eye's of the law; of course I would be accepting of it. But for a decade I have been teaching three hour classes at under-graduate and post-graduate level in the local college and the risk of me having a seizure is minimal.
I do not want my son to sleep over in my flat because of the higher risk and I do not want to take him on long journeys out of our home-town (Ipswich) because of the additional risk were I to have a seizure.
All I want is a couple of hours several times a week without being made to feel valueless.
Both in some time between early December 2013 and early January 2014.
These seizures were probably triggered by an alteration to my medication that was taking place at the time under the instruction of a Doctor.
I have had one other seizure this year at an unusual time and place - early in the year in Waitrose in Ipswich.
The number of seizures I have now are fewer than I have had at any stage since diagnosis in 1995.
Apart from straight forward seizures in my sleep every two to three weeks - unusual seizure times and places are triggered by:
Cold viruses - uncontrollable but easy to plan for.
Upset stomachs - quite controllable (I am trained as a cook)
Heavy amounts of alcohol (I used to drink too much - binge drinking, I do not now, I am separated)
Insufficient sleep - I always get sufficient sleep (8 hours)
Missing medication - highly unlikely - unless I am already unwell. 1 would lead to the other.
Extreme one-off stress events - My self-employment has significantly reduced my work based stress. My separation has significantly reduced my life stress.
I have a letter from a doctor saying that my condition is improving and I have never hurt anybody with my seizures.
I could get any type of letter saying virtually anything if I went to a Doctor; but I guess they would be almost worthless. I do not go to see a Doctor after having a seizure and anything that I say to my Doctor is my word which they will put in a letter unless it is something silly. If they ask me how my epilepsy has been I tell them the truth that it is better than it has been.
Maybe the information to be relied upon the most would be hospital records. I used to be taken to hospitals quite frequently to spend time, sometimes days on end. However now that my medication has been improved significantly, if I have a fit in public, people call a paramedic (which is what I would do) who attend to see me and then usually take me home or leave me in the company of someone I know.
My medication has improved significantly since attending an Expert Epilepsy Surgery twice a year in a London Hospital (my ex-wife organised this for me several years ago); who noted what I was taking was extremely old-school and could be improved upon.
I do not have a criminal record and have never been aggressive towards anyone. I have fallen on my son once in 6 years which did not hurt him. We have recently spoken about this and he is not concerned about it.