We had a First Appointment hearing called by my wife. Its four years since the nisi was obtained and she has failed to agree a fair financial settlement having run me into debt on credit cards. Late last year I asked her to proceed the case as I am the respondent (because she was previously able to get legal aid). At that time she refused saying she was happy to let it stay as it was. She has been living in the matrimonial home for all this time and refuses to agree to its sale. I have not pushed for a settlement to allow the children to finish formal education.
Because of a casual comment I made on facebook about wanting to work abroad this year she and her solicitor approached the court for an emergency hearing which was granted without any reference to me. This has therefore condensed the time frame and put extreme pressure on me to complete the required paperwork in the time allowed, especially as I am representing myself.
I have to supply a completed form E
A concise statement of the issues between the other party and me, a chronology and a questionnaire of other information and a form G.
This is all for the financial settlement.
We have been married for 30 years. She sought an end to the marriage 5 years ago citing my unreasonable behavior. Most of what she alleges is fabricated. As she had no grounds on which to seek a divorce she had to engineer some and so provoked a physical fight between us. She however had committed adultery and has been co-inhabiting in the former matrimonial home with her new partner for at least the last four years.
She is seeking that I relinquish any claim to the matrimonial home, that she has some portion of my pension and that I retain 100% of the debts that she ran up on my credit card accounts for which she had a spouse card and was therefore jointly responsible for creating.
I have been to three separate programmes of mediation to try and resolve the issue of the credit card debts and find a fair way forward. All have failed because of her refusal to accept responsibility for half the credit card debts.
I believe that it is unfair that she can accelerate the court process now after she has refused to do anything realistic for the last four years.
I hope this further information helps.
I don't know how best to respond to this court sanctioned bullying.