1- We lived together about 3 years, of which 1.5 years as married.
2- She worked part-time a year between 2013-2014 (even though in the solicitor's letter, they claim that she worked "full time" in that period). Before that she only did one or two short-term work. Some of the money that she was earning, she transferred it to my account because I had some savings accounts. However, some of these money, she just put into my account and asked me to transfer to her family members. Therefore, looking back at my past bank statements is quite complicated. In reality, I know that she has contributed less than what she is requesting now.
3- During the 3 years, I was paying our accommodation, food and travel costs, including her family travel costs etc.
I bought the property for £360,000 last year, and currently 300,000 is the outstanding balance on the mortgage. The current value of the house should be something around 380,000-400,000 .
Getting divorced is my higher priority, so if it is very difficult to win the case at court with the adultery route (i have witnesses that can testify that they were aware of the adultery), i might be willing to go Behaviour.
However, if changing the petition from Adultery to Unreasonable Behaviour will later on impact me negatively somehow (on my domestic violence case, or on the financial dispute etc.), then I might not accept that route. In fact, I would like to know why they badly want me to change it? Do you think it is going to help her with the Domestic Violence visa application?
Finally, I roughly think that she has given me around 10k during the few years, but that money will effectively be zero if you consider the money I spent on rent/travel etc.
Thanks a lot answer.
I have few earlier questions if you don't mind:
If I agree to such a settlement amount now, can it ever be made legally binding such that I will keep my house meaning she won't be able to claim any further money in the future? Or are they using this to test my acceptance limits, and then if I accept they will possibly find other excuses to ask money? Technically, can there ever be any “final” (set in stones) agreement between the parties before the divorce process finishes?- If they go to court, can they actually make me pay solicitor costs since I didn’t settle at an early stage?- On my bail condition, it is specified that I am not allowed to contact her, even indirectly. If I respond to her solicitor now, wouldn’t I be breaching that condition? Myself and my solicitor asked that same question to the detective via email, but the detective has not responded yet after 2 weeks.
Sorry further request. I am trying to understand her possible motivations in insisting me to change the petition type to Unreasonable Behaviour rather than Adultery. Leaving the pride possibility aside, can there be any other solid benefit why they asked me twice to change the petition type (especially when legal aid is not paying defence of a divorce petition as you mentioned)?
If I write and say that I will change my petition type provided that she admits the adultery, do you think there is any chance they might accept? Also, what is the possible benefit in getting such a written admission?
Thanks in advance
Thank you very much fast and accurate answer.
Can you please confirm the reasonable steps I need to take as follows:
1- I negotiate with her solicitor on the final settlement amount.
2- Meantime I also agree with them on what new reasons to state on the updated Divorce Petition form ( Behaviour). This is beneficial to avoid updating the Divorce Petition too much which might complicate the case ??
3- Apply the court to change the petition type from Adultery to Unreasonable Behaviour
4- After they respond to petition, apply Nisi.
5- Then get a solicitor to draft the Consent Order and get it agreed with their solicitor.
6- Apply to court Order approval
7- Apply to court Absolute
Finally, can you mention some commonly used reasons Unreasonable Behaviour? Considering I will change my petition from Adultery to Unreasonable Behaviour, I don't want to put some reasons that will be questionable by the judge.
Thanks. I would appreciate if you can provide some allegations based on my case.
I read your previous responses once more and could not exactly understand the following sentence:
"On that basis usually I would suggest an amendment to allow the divorce to progress however in this case I suggest instead that you write and say that you will withdraw your claim provided that she admits the adultery.This is based on the fact that Legal Aid will not finance a defence of a divorce petition - so it is worth a try."
Can you please clarify that sentence? which claims should I offer to withdraw?
In order to be able to pay some extra fee, I will now raise another question in another thread to you. I could not find any other ways to pay additional answers :)
I will respond them as per your suggestion (ask her to admit in return ). Her solicitor sent me both an email and a posted letter in the past. Shall I respond back via email or letter? Also, they had a "Without Prejudice" remark on their letter. Shall I do the same?
I have filed another question to you in another thread, so that I can ask further questions and pay further accordingly. I would appreciate if you can pick that question as well.