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Clare
Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 34105
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
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Resolved Question:

Me and my boyfriend have decided to finally break up after have been struggling in the relationship for nearly three years now.

He committed adultery with me and he admitted that in court. Now as we broke up he threatened me that he is going to name me as a co-respondent so I would pay half of the cost of procedure. 
Our relationship broke up on the ground of his unfaithfulness as I caught him on with a prostitute on 10th December 2014. This is not the only occasion he betrayed me and cheated on me, but I can't prove the rest (I have copy of text messages with the prostitute, the price and afterwards that he thanked her several times what a great service she provided).

He is full of anger and hatred as it was his second marriage and he blames it on me although the first marriage broke up because of his adultery in the first place. He admitted to me in the beginning of our relationship that he visited several prostitutes during his second marriage too and he had several affairs with his clients and/or friends. So he has a long history of being unfaithful.

What do I need to do if I receive divorce documents stating that I have to admit adultery? He was still living with his wife when we first met and first had sex, and he only left his wife because the wife found out that he had an affair.

Since then I am the one who went through physical abuse, mental and psychological abuse, and also verbal abuse. He broke my trust several times which I can prove with copies of text messages where he groomed other women behind my back and lied to me up until I showed my evidence. Constant belittling from his side is an everyday process.

I read articles saying that even though he admitted adultery, I don't have to admit it. But does it affect if I have to pay the legal costs, if so how much would it cost?

What would the consequences be if I don't admit adultery?

Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare
I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
For clarity - why has his wife delayed issuing divorce proceedings until now?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Hi Clare, thank you for your answer. She didn't delay it. She started the procedure shortly after she kicked him out of the matrimonial home, but my boyfriend wanted to defend it lying about the whole situation. Then the wife started playing with the kids that he couldn't see them for months, so that was another battle. Now a couple of weeks ago her solicitor sent the paperwork back. But it was already agreed that he admits adultery since defending would be more costly than just simply agree. Now he is just angry at the world. And he keeps threatening me with everything under the sky. I'm a bit worried. Thank you,Katalin
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
It is not up to your ex to name anyone - that is for his wife and it is unlikely that she will want to waste further costs my doing so so please don't worry
If she did serve papers on you then you can just ignore the paperwork - or send them back without admitting anything - it will not be a problem for you
Please ask if you need further details
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Thank you so much.
She named me in one of the points where she first claimed unreasonable behaviour, alcohol problems then that he didn't want to socialise anymore. I have the copy of the divorce papers. That was the longest point where she claimed her husband had an affair with a Hungarian masseuse (I'm a social worker and currently studying psychology as a second degree) and she mentioned my name.
So can we say that even though they are mentioning my name, and I never received any paper to reply to, it's just an empty threat from my boyfriend's side?
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
Yes - it i snot something that he can control
Clare
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