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Clare
Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 33817
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
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I have withdraw my child from the school because of her being

Customer Question

I have withdraw my child from the school because of her being unhappy and crying in the school every day . I have made the application for another school ,at the moment waiting for the Council reply. The school is registering her as absent , how to react and what to do ? I have already told them my daughter is not returning to this school anymore.
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare
I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
How old is the child and what was the cause of the distress?
What actions did the school take to work with you on the problem?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

She is 13 , she has been unhappy in this school for many months, however a friend of her has been seeing the Headteacher saying things (on behalf of my daughter ) which are not true about my family .

Since that day my daughter has been very distressed, didn't eat , she has been crying , she went sometimes to see the Headteacher and the staff of the school has been calling her many times to talk about her family. Last week she woke up in the night crying , arguing with me about why I don't give her the I-pod and saying to me - " the Headteacher is right when she asked me if I want to go to another family " . I was shocked and I asked details about her conversation with the Headteacher , I wrote to the child protection officer about this and I still don't have any answer !

I wrote to them that we are changing school .

Meanwhile I am trying to get an appointment with the catholic church and talk to them as well. I spoke to other moms , they told me some similar experiences but they couldn't believe the way the school delt the issue .

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
When did she last go to school and have Social services been involved at all?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Hi Clare

Last week Tuesday was her last day . No, Social service is not involved . I am a dedicated mom , my family has never been involved in this kind of services .

Anastasia

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
Have you been working with the school regarding the problems?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

I have been working I must say in a smooth way , we all agreed that my daughter is not happy , the school of course denied that she is being bullied as school, they wondered why she was saying things about her family , it all started " my brother pinched me" - this is what my daughter has told this friend. I assured them there is no violence in any kind in my family as I am everyday with them and look after them, I told them to leave my daughter in peace in order to concentrate in her academical achievement, she is an excellent pupil, she was happy during the term holidays at home because I agreed with her to change school September 2015 , I informed the school that she is changing school next year , she was fine the first week then one of the teachers called my husband saying she has been crying again, in the same time the Headteacher has called my daughter to see her .

After talking to my daughter about how she felt when the Headteacher talked to her , she said - she asks me questions that makes me cry - such as changing family .

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
Have you found another school willing to take her?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Hi Clare

Have you got my last reply ?

Anastasia

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
I am afraid not
I need to know whether you have actively spoken to another school with a view to he moving there?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Sorry I sent it via e- mail by mistake . Yes I spoke to a school who is willing to take her . I have registered my daughter for home- schooling today as long as I get the confirmation from the Council for another school , I did this because the school were my daughter is registered for the moment was making pressure registering her as absent .

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
Then you have done everything that you need to do
If the new school is willing to take her then you should not need the Council to do anything and she should be able to start almost immediately and accordingly there shoudl be no issues regarding attendance.
You shoudl formally write to the old school and withdraw her
Please ask if you need further details
Clare
Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 33817
Experience: I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
Clare and 2 other Family Law Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Hi Claire

The school willing to take my daughter is waiting for the reply from the Council . It is the way it works here in London. The last school my daughter was, has made a refer to the Social Services. They called me and they wanted to come in my house. I didn't agree , they insisted to see my daughter physically , I brought her to be seen in the front door of the old school . I asked them how it comes to this situation ? They said the school hasn't informed them what is exactly going on and they have said to the Service I don't pick up the phone. The school didn't get in touch with me for a week, they kept sending to me messages with the note of my daughter being absent, I have called them and said we are changing school , she is having home-schooling but they said as long as they don't have an official letter they don't accept it . I brought the official letter to the school personally but the Absent Officer didn't pick it up because she wasn't there, I addressed the letter to her name. However I told the Service it is not true about me not picking up the phone , in contrary I have been waiting from the school to ask at least how my daughter is doing ! And i can prove there is no e-mail or phone call from the school registered . They said it is proof enough that you picked up the phone and talked to us . Unfortunately because the school has made the refer we will request from you a family assessment . I said no, I will not accept it . My question is am I breaking the law ? I don't want to get involved with the Social Services because it leave space for me to concentrate on my daughter's full time education .

Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Sorry , I wanted to say getting involved with Social Services it doesn't leave me space to concentrate in my daughter's full time education.

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
HI
You must cooperate with Social Services and allow them to complete the assessment.
Failure to do so is likely to raise serious issues about the care of your daughter and cause even more distraction and distress.
In fact the Family assessment may well assist you in securing the school place sooner rather than later
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Thanks Clare

I will see how things will go this week. The most important matter now is to look after my daughter at home and family . I am a German citizen , in Germany Social Services get involved on request of the parents unless there is evidence of violence . This is not the case here .

Anastasia

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
This is not the position in the UK.
Social Services can be involved for many different reasons and have to complete a Family assessment where concerns of any type are raised
You MUST cooperate
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

I will try ! Thanks for your advice Clare . I don't know the British Family law so well . Just googling and the expiriences from other families involved with Social Services is not good . However , I am also trying to get in contact with the German Embassy . Today I spoke to a catholic priest from the church I go sometimes, he suggested to listen well to my daughter and take the direction or school she wants as soon as possible otherwise I might be in a very difficult situation also because the Headteacher must have said negative things about me to the Social Services . Anyway I will do the best I can to get out of this critical family situation .

Anastasia

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
Try not to worry - you have very little reason to be concerned and not all the horror stories are real!
Clare

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