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Ask Clare Your Own Question
Clare
Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 34289
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
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I am a grand parent and I am being

Customer Question

Hi my name is Annette
I am a grand parent and I am being denied access to have the grandchildren to stay for say a weekend or a week.
My son as three children that I can not see
These children are to, two different women... I know long story
He is now married to someone else and since then it as got worse... Before he married the two elder children could come and stay but since he married all access was denied
With the eldest children I have a very good relation and will purchase items send gift again I am not allowed to have the children stay for a weekend but I can only have them for say four hours I would like them to come and stay with me she totally refuses.. Saying it is my sons' fault and just totally refuses access
The mother for the third child does not allow us to see him at all. The last time was over two years ago he is now five years old
I feel that this is unfair he will feel that we do not care for him. I send a gift card through the post for birthdays, christmas and easter but again no access ...
My son wants to try but since these women are very confrontational he backs off but I think we should do some thing... Can I do anything about this at all
What advice can you give
do I have to wait until they are sixteen before any thing can be done
Thanks
Kind Regards
Annette Gregory
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare
I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
Which part of the Uk are you in and how old are the older children?
What contact does your son have with them?
clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Hi Clare
I live in Warwickshire and so does my son. The children live in Manchester. My son see the children about once every two months.. Since the older mother will refuse him the right to see them.
The children are aged 12 and 9
Hope this helps
Kind regards
Annette
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
What excuse do the mother's give for the lack of contact with your son?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

with the older children is states that since he has married he only wants to be with the child that they have I know this is not true since he calls them every week but she doesn't answer the phone I have been there to see for myself

My son moved to go to college and she did not agree with the move but he did would go to Manchester to see the kids and he was refused access .. Because he had the third child

There was concern about the safety of his son and my son challenged the family (her family and had social services involved) since then we have not had been allowed to have the children ... I have been told that both the children had mental health issues and were visiting the mental health team

Again my son was blamed for this but by this time he had moved...She felt that he did not contribute to the welfare of the children.. But he did ... It was just that I went because every time he tried to make a visit he could not go or she would start shout and swearing and so to stop the confrontation in front of the children my son would give me the money and I would go ...

Kind regards

Annette

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
What did Social Services have to say?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Social services didn't do anything much.. I was told but could not confirm that the children went on the child protection - Not sure if they were CAF or a full order...

But I am aware that my grand son never really says anything any more and we never really (I would say push) for him to say anything.. Just due to the fact that if we get any contact we don't really want to upset or stop the visit or give her a reason to stop the visit

I know that the last time his father was allowed to see him he had said that he wanted to live with him but we again don't want to cause an issue..

When I am going they cry ...But our hands are tied and so we just say and do nothing ... we just want to see the children

Thanks again

Kind Regards

Annette

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
Social Services shoudl have told the father what was going on.
Has the father made any court applications for contact?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Hi Clare

No.. Social service had not given him much information.. He had said that they thought that my grand son was lying but he was not, not if you know him..

he had started a few times once she got the letter she would allow access but then would stop.. Then he would say it would not be good for the children to see him taking their mother to court so he didn't complete..

Kind Regards

Annette

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
HI
How often have you seen the children in the last year?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Hi Clare
I have seen them about 8 times
Regards
Annette
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
Your strongest chance of getting regular overnight contact would be if your son was willing to make an application to the court for a Child Arrangement Order which included overnight contact at your house.
If he will not do this you will need the permission of the court to apply for a Child Arrangement Order (you will get permission) - however as a grandparent you are more likely to get visiting contact than overnight contact with the older two - and you may get some limited contact with the younger child.
The starting point however is to try and discuss matters with the mothers using Family mediation
www.familymedaitionhelpline.co.uk
I hope that this is of assistance - please ask if you need further details
Clare
Clare and 2 other Family Law Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Hi Clare

Thank you

I will discuss with my son and see what he say

I will try the mediation and see what happens

But if nothing changes then I will try and see if I can get something legal.

Again thank you for your advice

Kind Regards

Annette

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
Excellent - the mediation will put you in a place which will allow you to make the application
Clare