I want to find out about the duxbury calculation. my husband probably has equity of 100k in our house if it were split 50:50. but we have two girls that i look after. i went on a career break of 5 years and looked after themm i have returned to work but my pay has fallen from 50-6-k in 2006 to 37k gross now. i want my husband to walk away from equity in the house so wanted to show his the duxbury calculatiins to encourage him to do so. he earns 60k and has 5% of a business which may pay out share options of £600 k. i just want security of a home. I WANT TO SEE WHAT THE DUXBURY CALCULATION WOULD BE. I AM 42, dont smoke, earning 37 k, 2 children, 5 year career break. HE is EARNING OVER 60k. There is a house with 200k equity that could be used to capitalise with.
children are 5 and 7. the cheapest 3 bed property in this area is £370k. Family home is worth £450-£470k . There is a soft loan to his parents of £230k.
He has started, belatedly, paying child mainteance of £620 per month.
My £370k figure is probably for a maisonette. A house would be 420-450. A different post code would be cheaper but would take us out of good catchment area for secondary school, reason for buying in this area.
Also married since Oct 2009 but cohabited for 10 years. I am 42 he is 35. Children 5 and 7.
no formal mortgage your right. his parents did put a charge on the property. when together they verbally said that it didnt need to be pay backed and we paid only very small amounts back. now he has left me for someone else i am told they want it back, but still interest free. They say i can pay it back in 12 years time but want my husband to remain having a 50 or 45% stake in the house. i dont like this at all as in 12 years time it would have increaded in value- no benefit to me and i will be in my 50s with no means of being able to buy him out. hence i would like demonstarte to him best to walk away from the equity and i in return will not push for spousal maintenance or shares. i hope his parents would continue to let me have soft loan or ideally walk away from this - but suppose them and husband walking away is unlikley. With my restricted salary and living in london its hard to see how i can continue as a home owner.
there are clauses that say that if we seperate then all monies owed to be paid back.
no normal debt.
The loan is by this agreement made as a deed and offered for purchasing a family home. The loan is charged by the borrowers on the property by way of a charge and we the borrowers agree jointly and severally to pay the lenders. The lenders will not require payment aslong as the lenders comply with the provisions of the charge - which includes not being divorced or treated as seperate for tax purposes.
As i only earn £36 k gross and receive £680 per month child mainteance. I think i would only be able to borrow £90 k and that would still be difficult to pay back monthly amounts of £600 per month. Trouble is i live in a nice area of south london so 3 bed flats are £370k and we have a pet cat. I feel very worried. When married it all felt so secure- his parents were our 'mortgage providers' and we only paid 400 per month back and could take mortgage holidays and he is going to get £600 k in shares so it all felt very safe and a good idea for me to take a career break of 5 years and for me to put all the money from the sale of my house £70 k into our house. Now both those things seem very unwise. I work in an international job so if i worked full time again i would have to travel and that is not easy / possible to do while looking after little people. Prior to getting married i was posted overseas, this is still an option for me, and is profitable. however, my husband will not agree to me taking the girls overseas. So without spousal mainteance - or capitalisation of spousal mainteance through transfer of property I just do not see how i can afford to continue to live in south london yet he says i am not allowed to leave the m25 area.
my husband strongly encouraged me to take a career break when we had two children so that he could focus on his career and be made a share holder of the small company he works for. this happened, he is only a 5% share holder and has share options which were estimated to make him £600 k when the company gets sold to a private equity firm or another firm. the company is trying to be sold. Obviously husband is now saying the company is no longer profitable and this isn't about to happen. i have a copy in writing that he owns 5% of the company and the companies estimation that he should get £600 k when co sells. i realise the 600k relates to share options and obviously i cannot afford accountants to look into this so would probably not get anything. He does actually own 5.1% of company and we did not put any of our money into owning the company.husband just worked rediulous hours (or that is what he hold me he was doing) doesn't seem fair but doubt there is anything i could do. its annoying as i really wanted to go back to work after two years and he stopped me and i wanted to make pension contributions to my civil service pension) but he said no - as we will be rich with his shares in the future and until then we were comfortable with no real mortgage. My pension is worth 78 k - i reckon his is worth about the same so there isn't anything there. hence all i think i should try to get is as much of the equity of the property as possible as that is all i have to try to be secure with two children. if / when i have to pay his parents the money back - they will just hand that straight back to him. his siblings have been 'loaned' similar amounts and as they dont work - i doubt they have paid any of it back. He will get his shares and at only 35 on 60K can reasonably expect to get promotions. I can only get promotion or pay rises by working full time and taking an overseas posting or travelling overseas with work - neither thing i can do. Hence my thinking would the capitalisation of spousal mainteance charts help show that he should give up on equity of the property for a clean break. He is in a new relationship and has admitted adultery and has asked me to divorce him on that grounds - he is keen to be divorced as quickly as possible. Retianing 45-50% ownership of the house doesn't seem fair to me or in the spirit of a clean break. It seems like wanting a clean break of the bits you dont like but wanting to keep an unnecessarry financial interest in our home. My husband leaves and becomes my landlord. He has paid no money for any mainteance of the house, nor paid a penny towards any household bills including house insurance, nor has he mended anything or done any household mainteance since leaving. He does have keys to the house and i find him in the house when i have been out. this annoys me - he says he was passing and the children wanted to go to the toilet, or he thought they were coming back to me - not true. I assume there is nothing i can do about this so - I just tell him that i dont want him to do it. On telling me there was someone else, he left that day and 9 days later was all set up in a very nice 2 bed little house - fully furnished at a cost of about £1250 per month. its only 5 min walk away from the family home. Its just renting at the moment. I suspect his parents paid for it and furnished it. I think he and his family will be keen to keep me in this nice area - because of the schools and knowing exactly where we are. I really do not want to carry on owning a property with him keeping a percentage of that property. It would irritate me if i was doing all the mainteance and it wouldnt seem woth my while making it nice, and the silly way property prices go up in london mean when the children turn 18 i would not be able to buy him out so the property (our home) would have to be sold and i would have to move into a place very small, probably too small for the children to come with me. I will not be in a good place for getting a mortgage as i will be 55. My salary, as a civil servant, 37k gross - will only have increased by 1% a year. what should i do?
i dont know. they dont need money - we are paying £10 per month, at their request,for the 'mortgage'. they are very controlling and want to be seen as good. i think they do all want me to stay in this house until the children are 18. i am very concerned about my husbands proposal that he has 45-50% stake in property - and mother in laws statement that i could live here until the children are 18 but then it must be sold. and that i cannot buy my husband out until all the monies to his parents have been paid back - thereby seems to me an interest by them in keeping me here and keeping a good deal for my husband - he effectively owns a second property. i am sure within a year he wont be renting.
to anticipate your next question - do i have a good relationship with his parents? i have tried, never rowed with them, still invite them over and to sta y at the house (they decline), i send them pics of the girls and let the girls go and stay with them for a week at a time. but their son s still their son. i guess they care about his financial well being a lot more than mine. though i think it is very short sighted to have the house sold when children reach 18 - as they will resent loosing their bedrooms and not being able to continue living with their mum.
i had thought i might propose that they offer just me that loan and i would agree to pay it back in 12 years to them, this may require me having to sell the propert then - if i cant afford to pay them back - but with husband not owning a percentage of the property it is predictable the amount of money i would owe and would be more likely to get a mortgage in 12 years time for what is likly to then be a smaller percentage of the value of the property. for their loan is not in percentage terms. if they say no, not withour husband, able to have a percentage of the property that would show they do care more about financial investment rather than the chidrens best interest. what would then happen? can i just refuse to continue to own the property with my husband - they i suppose can evict me - they would not want to do that. what should i do