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ukfamilysolicitor
ukfamilysolicitor, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 1184
Experience:  Divorce, Finances, Children, Domestic Violence, Care Proceedings
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My son has been hit and abused by his mum ? i reported to police

Resolved Question:

my son has been hit and abused by his mum ? i reported to police and my son told what happend he is 12 by the way , and they seem to think that i made my son say this i am so sad by this , and not only that we have shared residence order in place but trying to get full residence in my favor but , she is very clever how she manipulate every one that i made all this up and saying to child to do this ? i have recordings to prove this happend
can i use it ?
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  ukfamilysolicitor replied 2 years ago.
hello
Thank you for your question.
I am a Solicitor and will assis you.
Please can you confirm:
- When was the incident reported to the police?
- are the police still investigating? if so are there are conditions in place that prevent the mum contacting your son?
- Did the police make a referral to social services? if so - what did they say?
_ are there any court orders in relation to the time that your son spends with you and his mum?
- Has your son seen his mum following making the disclosure to you?
- how much time was your son spending with his mum prior to the disclosure?
- has your son expressed his wishes and feelings about spending time with his mum?
Kind regards
Caroline
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
was reported on the 5th just gone he was with me until yesterday afternoon where he had to go back with mum as I would be breaking court order the police said I made all this up and the child services referral was cancel by them after they spoke to mum as she said I was after full custardy, and told my son to say this court order is shared , mon tues until Wednesday morning with me Wednesday afternoon until Friday and alternate weekends . yes my son said its like he didn't know her when she was hitting him .
Expert:  ukfamilysolicitor replied 2 years ago.
Thank you for your response.
Did your son enjoy the time yesterday? is he back with you now? what are the arrangements?
Kind Regards
caroline
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
I haven't heard from him ? he will be with mum until Monday morning as per order.
Expert:  ukfamilysolicitor replied 2 years ago.
Hello
Thank you for your response.
I am sorry to hear about the difficulties that you have been experiencing.
You of course have a duty to protect your son and if your sons discloses to you that he has been abused by his mother then it is of course the correct action for the matter to be reported to police and social services so that investigations can take place.
I note that in your case, despite your son's age - he appears not to have been believed and it is being suggested that you are in fact putting your son 'up to' saying such things to try and frustrate the time that your son spends with his mum. This could be argued to be causing your son emotional harm. In the current circumstances as you have described them - I do not consider that it would be wise to offer the recording of your son making the disclosures to you. This could be considered as further causing emotional harm to your son by 'making him' do this.
I note that following a 3 month gap - the previous arrangements has now been reinstated and that your son is going to return to your care on Monday. When you son is back in your care - then you need listen to your son's wishes and feelings in respect of the time that he spends with him mum. You need to be very careful not to be seen pressurising your son.
If things went well - then great. Let the routine continue if this is what your son wants. Do however note that if your son was to make any further disclosures to you in the future then you should again report to police and social services. I know that this hasnt previoulsy helped in your case - but this is the correct thing to do.
If your sons wishes and feelings are that he doesnt want to spend with his mum then you should consider referring this matter back to court to seek a variation/ discharge of the current order. Mediation might also be able to assist.
Kind Regards
Caroline
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Customer: replied 2 years ago.
sorry the recording is a fact of the mum hitting at the time of actually happening you can hear her punching him and been abusive to him , and been thrown to floor .
Expert:  ukfamilysolicitor replied 2 years ago.
Hello
Thank you for confirming that the recording was actually made by your son during a physical assault on him by his mum.
Did the police and social services know about this at the time when they investigated?
Kind regards
Caroline
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
no its a my phone which was programed to monitor all activities online and games , and it was random recordings which I found after my son told me what happened . and nobody knows only you and me ? what would be the consequences if I used this as evidence as I have been accused of making the hole story up, and telling my son to do tell police and social services ,
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
I can send recording for you to listen?
Expert:  ukfamilysolicitor replied 2 years ago.
Hello
I think now that this recording has come to your attention - you need to explain this to the police and pass this to them so that they can make their enquiries. The police may or may not decide to pursue matters and if you are confident that your son will resonate that it is a true recording then I cannot see this causing you any difficulties.
If the police do take action then they might take the step of putting a conidtion in place which stops the mother contacting your son whilst the matter is ongoing.
It would normally be my advice that if the police decided not to investigate and the mother sought to enforce the previous order - that you made an urgent application to the court on C100 asking for the court to consider suspending/amending the previous order whilst matters are invesitgated.
I am somewhat cautious for several reasons - your son in 12 - I am unsure why the police would not believe him initally (recording or not - although I know that this was not available at the time) and suggest that you had made him say such things and the time he has spent with his mum has actually started again. I therefore consider that you very carefully and sensitively ascertain your sons wishes and feelings and then make an application to the court. This could of course be supeceded if there is criminal action.
Kind regards
Caroline
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Customer: replied 2 years ago.
she kept on calling him and saying to him that why you making all this up and he would say mum its true bye mum I love you and she would again do the same , and on the last phone call he felt bad but was scared at the same time he did call child line but not sure what was the out come of that ,but he also claimed that this was not the first time and she has a depression rate of 23 out of 27 which has also been ignored , the x turns every thing around and they believe her .
Expert:  ukfamilysolicitor replied 2 years ago.
Hello
Thank you for this.
You have to tell the police about the recording that has been made. If they decide to puruse matters them let them guide you ie if they put conditions in place while they investigate then stick to these.
Ascertain in a child friendly way - your sons wishes and feelings.
If the police dont take any action then return the matter back to court so that the court can investigate.
Kind regards
Caroline
Expert:  ukfamilysolicitor replied 2 years ago.
Please kindly remember to rate positively - your question will not close and I will be able to answer your follow up questions for free. Kind regards.
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