I saw my ex husband's pay slip over a year and a half ago, he earns about £3,000/monthly after taxes. He's a manager at Grant Thornton (financial services).
I've always had my suspicions that he's been hiding a property purchase from me.
When we were married, I gave him £10,000 from my savings over the years in the summer of 2013 which was intended for a deposit so we could buy a property together. He told me that he put this money in his savings account, and always kept telling me during our marriage that we would continue saving and put down a bigger deposit.
Obviously the marriage broke down, and this money was still in his possession.
During divorce proceedings, he later revealed that this money had been spent on the family's living expenses during the marriage due to his financial difficulties, and could not be returned back to me.
This made no sense to me because based on my ex's monthly earnings, and based on what the family's outgoings were (monthly rent, bills, groceries, miscellaneous expenses) his monthly salary would have sufficiently covered the monthly outgoings without him having to dip into the savings that were designated for the purpose of buying a property.
I suspect that he used my money to secretly purchase a property in his own name, which I am unaware of. We always lived in London during the course of the marriage. But he's originally from Manchester and all his family are there. I am very much suspicious that he could have easily bought a property in Manchester without me ever knowing anything about this. His parents live there, and every time we used to visit, he always had a tonne of post at their house. He hardly had any post sent to our London address.
It could be possible that anything mortgage related to his property was sent to his parents address.
I was advised that I would have to bring civil action against him if I wanted my £10,000 returned in small claims court.
I am unemployed and on benefits (child tax credit, child benefit, and income support). My ex pays £500 monthly as child maintenance as we have 2 children who live with me. I was told that this is 20 percent of his monthly salary so is an appropriate amount.
Also he has not offered me any monthly payments at all. The only thing he pays is child maintenance, and the shortfall of the rent not covered by housing benefit every month.
Thanks a lot for your reply.
Would I need to make an application for ancillary relief before or after signing the decree absolute? I haven't been referred to mediation yet.
I really do believe that he's most certainly got something to hide. That is why he hasn't come back to my solicitor yet saying whether or not he consents to form e disclosure at this stage. And its been over 2 months since this was brought up. She did say if he was to refuse at this point, I would need to apply for ancillary relief and then he would be compelled to provide disclosure under form e. Is that correct?
My solicitor never highlighted the possibility of spousal maintenance to me, so she's not been very thorough about my options.
Just wondering how long can ancillary relief proceedings last?
No haven't yet. At the moment its just very slow correspondence back and fourth between solicitors.
Thanks so much for your reply, this is very helpful indeed. Just wondering, would mediation only deal with financial issues, or would custody issues be brought up as well?
Are residence/contact arrangements dealt with under mediation as well?
Sorry to complicate things, but forgot to mention that I would also like to move abroad with my kids after the divorce is finalised so I can be closer to family and get them to help me look after the little ones. Childcare would be a lot more affordable for me as compared to right now with my restrictive budget.
Given that I need my ex's consent, do you think that this issue could complicate ancillary relief proceedings?
This issue of me moving abroad with the kids was also brought up nearly 2 months ago, but my ex has just left it pending, as he did with the form e request.
He's just dragging things out unnecessarily. I've just got the decree nisi today.
In case if he refuses to give us permission to move, would that need to be dealt with in court under a separate hearing?