Thank you Clare
The house was owned by my partner and was a new build - built for us to move into as a family in 2006. It is worth approx. £275,000 (recently valued) however I believe it has been re mortgaged recently to pay off other mortgage loans in the limited company. I know he has just paid off a £60k mortgage on a another property with his savings. Not entirely sure whats owing. The children are now almost 8 and 9 years old. Is that too vague? Sorry!
His income varies but he earns an approx. min of £600 a week to £1400 per week. That is his day job. His limited company has 4 houses paying approx. £550 a month each and a another property that is about £1200 a month. Some years over the time I have been living with him he has earnt £60 - 70k in his day job.....never less than £45k and some years more than £70k
No he never said that. I was told to choose décor etc and I do household chores but we just moved in with a new baby and that was our home - he never actually said it was mine. In fact he regularly reminds me that I had nothing when I arrived and everything belongs to him - its HIS house, HIS car, HIS money etc and enjoys reminding me I am financially in his debt as it were because he has paid the bills when I have been at home and not working!
The reason for the separation is increased 'controlling' behaviour - he has always put me down but now more than ever....tries to make me feel 'worthless' without him etc. Not physically aggressive! But emotionally destructive. I have kept a diary of this since 2010 when he started doing this regularly. Also has accused me of cheating on him (not true) and I have seen and photographed messages he has sent to women on social media that have been suggestive - some I have confronted him about (which he denies saying he didn't know he'd sent a message to anyone and claims he doesn't know about computers) and more recently I have not bothered to confront him just taken pictures! Not sure if this helps or not.
I have put in no financial contribution, however as I have said I have helped with tenants, paying rent into bank, decorating properties for rent, gardening, etc which I was not paid for.
He doesn't receive a regular wage or amount from the company.
Hope this helps.
He has bought a van and took expenses, but that's just assets etc. He paid off a mortgage with money in there but doesn't take cash out of the business
What about the children? If I decide to leave the home and move closer to my family where I will get the support I need, can I just move them 100 miles without his consent?
No. He doesn't know I'm moving out....I'm not expecting it to go down well but I just can't take any more, especially not with my children to look after and starting a new career! I am in touch with you because I need to know vaguely where I stand before I do this as I am in a very vulnerable position! I need to move closer to my family as I have no one here for support. I just have to have some kind of idea what my rights are first. Does that make sense?
I do breakfast and take children to school. I pick up from school, I cook dinner, do homework and reading, I put them to bed etc etc. He will do some of that if he is around but works longer hours than me and therefore isn't always around. He takes them to football training as often as I do. So I mainly pick up their care!
However he said he is happy to retire at the point we split and therefore will be home to look after them all the time! But surely he cant do that?
That is everything. Thank you....didn't get the answers I wanted but I got the RIGHT answers!!! Thank you for your advice and the links. You have been very helpful!!