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Ask Clare Your Own Question
Clare
Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 34581
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
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My wife has been having an affair and we have been living together

Customer Question

My wife has been having an affair and we have been living together in the marital family home until she has a mortgage to buy me out. She has now said that her partner is moving in as well. Is this legal?
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Jo C. replied 2 years ago.
I presume she intends moving him in while you are there?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Yes
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Hello?
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
Thank you for your question.
My name is ***** ***** my colleague has asked me to look at this for you
When is the buy out due to take place?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
She hasn't got a mortgage yet so there's no date set and I am very much against him being in my house but both our names are ***** ***** mortgage and I don't know if I can stop him.
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
May I ask how much the house is worth and how much is outstanding on the mortgage?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
House worth £200k mortgage around £120k but i need to know what rights I have to stop him from staying in my house.
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
So long as your wife is in the property then her guest can be there - when she is not there then he has no right to be and you can exclude him.I suggest that you point out to your wife that this would be an unpleasant situation for all of you and one which will mean her partner will have to leave whenever she does whether he wishes to or not.Arrange to discuss settlement with her usingFamilY mediationwww.familymediationehlpline.co.uk to set a more realistic timetable for settlementI hope that this is of assistance - please ask if you need further detailsClare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
We have a disabled daughter who needs assistance and a 9 yr old son am I within my right not to allow him to engage with them when I am there?
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
How will the children share their time between you after the move?How long have you and your wife been separated?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
I found out about the affair in May. At the moment she is dictating when I see the kids because the residence arrangements aren't going to be sorted until she gives me money from her mortgage if she gets one. We may need to sell the property but I need to know my rights as to who she can allow to care for my kids.
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Is there any specific reason why you have concerns about this man?Where will you live once you do leave the property?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
No specific reasons except that my wife will be very proactive in making sure I am excluded from helping with my disabled daughter and this will make things very awkward. She has already made my 9 year old son stay in the room and listen to her saying I'm not a good dad and telling me that my son doesn't want to be with me however my son is visibly upset and afraid of her and tells me that what she says is not true. I am hoping to get accommodation near my children when I move out but can only do this when my name is ***** ***** joint mortgage.
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Have you considered renting?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Yes I will rent when I get the money from the house and my name off the mortgage I can't afford to move out until then. Also if I moved out before the finances were resolved she would not make any effort to help the situation. I'm not prepared to pay half of a mortgage for a house I don't live in but her boyfriend does. I need to know my rights as to who engages with my children.
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Unless there is specific reason why this man is a risk to children then no you cannot ban him from interacting with them.If you chose to move out sooner rather than later you certainly would not have to continue paying the mortgage in anyway shape or form - and the fact that she will have moved her partner in means that you can force the sale if need be
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Why would I not have to pay the mortgage if it's in joint names? If she didn't pay if I would get adverse credit sgainst me.
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Since you would not be living at the property it would be up to your ex to pay the mortgage using the child maintenance that you pay her and her income from other spurces
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
I assume this would need to be registered with a lawyer?
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
You could certainly negotiate it and have a Separation Agreement drawn up - or it can be part of the final Financial order within divorce proceedings