Hello Clare, thank you for answering this for me.
I have downloaded a file which gives me very detailed advice as to how to fill in Form E so my questions should all be fairly simple and straightforward.
My first questions are to just to check on which names I put in which boxes I fill in. The advice I have downloaded is for the person who has applied for the Financial order not the respondent, since my ex applied I need you to please confirm if the following is correct.
I am the Respondent and my ex the Applicant, so his name goes first in the top right hand box on page 1 on Form E and mine underneath.
Then my name goes after 'of' on the left hand side.
I tick 'spouse' underneath that,
then tick 'Respondent in the'
leave the next line of boxes blank,
I tick 'financial relief application'.
On the right hand side,
I put my ex's name,
under that tick 'Applicant'
leave the next line blank
then tick 'financial relief application'.
It seems obvious to me but I don't want to make a mistake!
Thank you, ***** ***** made the corrections.
I have more questions for the moment. (!)
Again on the first page, next to my name under 'of' I tick 'spouse' and fill in today's date (or the date I send the form); is that correct?
I was sent three copies of the form and am making corrections on the copy I intend to keep so as not to mess up the other two... providing they all (eventually) read the same, it is ok if my copy is a bit messy and I just copy over the correct information to the other two by hand?
On Page 2, I am asked to put in the date of the Petition for divorce/dissolution/nullity/ (judicial) separation. Is this the date of the certificate for entitlement to a decree? I have that document, but I do not have a record of the date of my ex's petition.
Page 2, 1.11 Asks for details of the state of health of myself and our children. My daughter suffers from asthma which was of great concern to me when my ex and I parted and she was living with me (she was 17 at the time, she no longer lives with me). My eldest son (who was 22 then) was living nearby and was addicted to cocaine which was also of great concern. I was able to helped him to quit the drug. He then lived with me for almost a year whilst he was recovering and I supported him whilst he was studying for a Yacht Master's certificate.
I have suffered on and off from anxiety and depression which has been almost exclusively down to the financial hardship and my ex's behaviour.
Would it be sensible to put all of this in? (at this stage).
Am I likely to have to show evidence to prove my state of health? (I think I can).
HI Clare,Thanks for your answers, I'm getting there!
On page 7, I am asked to write down any monies owed to me. I lent my husband 14,000 €, should I write this in here?
My only income is a sum of money paid monthly to me out of my father's company, it is purely to assist me and is not secure, he could stop paying it at any time.
I am putting this payment in Part 10 Income: Any other income.
I have to say what this income has been in the last financial year...presumably the uk's financial year. If I remember rightly it runs from 1st April to 31st March, is this correct?
If so should I put in my income for the year to March 2015 or this year which is not a full one?
Hi again Clare,
Time is running out! I have agreed to exchange financial statements on the 24th Dec, but can't work on my statement beyond the 21st (Monday) as I travel to England then.
So here are some further questions, I would appreciate it if you could get back to me as quickly as possible, thank you.
Under Financial requirements it asks me to continue the sentence: 'I anticipate my income needs are going to change because.......'
The fact is that my standard of living has been such that for the past 7 years I have not been able to pay for the things anyone living on a basic income would normally be able to. In order to catch up and improve my circumstances including my living accommodation which is inadequate, my income needs to increase so that I can do these things...for example buy some new shoes, clothes, visit the dentist, optician etc.
Should I write this into that section as I have just done to you?.
Following this I have listed my income needs either leaving out those items or putting them in at a very low rate.
Along side the items I have listed the estimated future cost of covering them if I did have the income to do so.
Is this correct?
on page 23. (Other information) 4.3
I am asked if there are any particular contributions to the family property and assets or outgoings etc.....that have been made by you, your partner or anyone else that you think should be taken into account?
Here should I add in the money given to us by my father towards the purchase of our first house together and a later sum, and then also the money I was given and held in my own bank account (85,000 GBP) that was intended for an investment but had to be used to support the family...(as I have described to you before, husband wanted to start a business and lost everything).
During our marriage my husband also inherited 25,000 GBP at one point and put the whole lot into our joint business to pay off debts. (he ran the finances!)...how much detail do I put in here? I am sure my ex will put in every penny he brought in. Should I say what I know about it or just keep it super simple?
Bad behaviour. This could be an extensive paragraph that would cover alcoholism, domestic abuse, violence and physical injury to me, financial abuse, etc. My ex will no doubt point at what he sees as my 'bad behaviour' subsequent to our separation, which was in the form of endlessly writing letters to him to plead for help to the point that he charged me with harassment. Please could you say how much I should say at this point?
almost there....I hope!
Also hoping to hear back from you soon.
Thank you Clare.
I have reworded the paragraph which no reads:
because....' I need to improve my standard of living. My income was so low whilst I was supporting my children (the last one left in July 2015), that I have neither had nor been able to replace basic items such as clothing, shoes or furniture for myself. Visits to the dentist and opticians are also over due. My living accommodation is inadequate for my needs. The habitable living area of my home which has no heating or air-conditioning and is also damp, is 44 m2. It includes one bedroom of 9 m2 and is damp, there is no bath, the kitchen only has a hob and 1ft square electric oven to cook with. There is no outside storage. My landlord will allow me to make improvements but at my own costs. My income needs to increase so that I can do this.'
How does that sound?
I will shortly send you what I will write about bad behaviour.
Thank you again! You are a real star, thank you so much for this.
I have pasted below the next sections I have written out. Please can you comment or suggest any amendments. I have kept the last section on behaviour as brief as possible, if you think I need to cut more out please advise as to how.
Section 3 Financial Requirements Part 2 Capital needs. (page 21)
Capital needs for myself:
£ 3,000 Home improvements including: Dampproofing, Woodburning stove + installation, Air-conditioning unit, Oven & installation, Outside brickwork to close in terrace (making more habitable space). Garden.
£ 3,000 Shed or outside building for workshop or spare room.
£ 1,100 To register my car in Spain.
£ 5,800 Fusing kiln including delivery.
£ 2,000 Other equipment, benches fixtures and fittings.
£ 1,000 Website building and marketing budget.
Other information. Section 4.3 (page 23)
Before and during our marriage I contributed to our assets and outgoings by working first full time in our joint business and then part time both in our joint business and in my own business so that I could look after the children and our home.
My father contributed
£ 6,000 towards our first house,
£ 1,200 towards the last house we owned,
£15,000 at another point and we received many other smaller amounts over the years of which I have not kept records.
£75,000 Was paid to me on the 10th November 2004 for an investment. I kept it in my own bank account but was unable to invest the money as I had to support our family with it and from the income from my craft. I paid for all the domestic bills including rent and school fees.
£965.00 7th August 2007, for something for one of our children.
December 2008 my husband’s business had failed, we were behind on the rent and about to be evicted from our home. We separated. I had a £3,000 investment (in gold bullion) but no other money. I cashed the investment in and from then on supported and looked after our 17 year old daughter who was still at school until she left home in May 2010. In October 2009 our unemployed middle son also came to live with me and continued to do so for extensive periods of time until July 2015. I also supported our eldest son for a year whilst he was studying and had no home, income or transport.
Payments from my father to assist me and our children since March 2009 have been continuous and total to date approximately £40,000
March 2009 £ 4,000.
April 2009 to December 2009 £ 9,000 total (£1000 per month towards my rent).
December 2012 £ 5,000
January 19th 2015 £ 1,375 towards a Personal Training course for our son
March to Dec 2105 £10,275
Payments by my ex:
Between Nov 2010 and Aug 2011 £ 3,600 (approx)
I would like the court to take into account that this is the total that was paid by him towards the care of me and our children over the last 7 years and that although I attempted to earn a living from menial work (cleaning) and some small sales of my craft it was not enough to supply even our most basic needs: even with my father’s assistance.
Each of our children needed a great deal of help, care and guidance due the many difficulties they were having as a result of the troubles and traumas they had encountered during their childhoods.
Our eldest son was addicted to cocaine and our middle son, unemployed, was also taking drugs. Our daughter was deeply depressed and had suicidal thoughts. I helped and supported them.
I would like the court to take into consideration the behaviour of my ex-husband.
In 1992 my husband, who has a long term problem with alcohol, lost control of himself and the effect that alcohol has on him. His character changed and his behaviour became extremely volatile and unpredictable, he used emotional blackmail, coercion and aggression to control and get what he wanted. Amongst other things I was subjected to regular violent verbal and physical abuse and sustained bruising and other injuries and was threaten with a knife. I called the police to our house on three occasions but never formally reported him or made a complaint. I was very cautious about what I did and felt very restricted in what I could say and discuss with him. He also controlled all of our business finances and would not give me the wages from my work separately from his. When I started my own small business in the late 1990’s it made matters worse. My ex never took responsibility for his drinking, behaviour or the injuries he caused me.
In 2003 we sold up and moved to Spain. My ex had plans to grow his small business and open a shop but our joint capital had run out and he had no money of his own so I had to support the family on my income and my father’s money whilst he did this. He put pressure on me to lend to him saying he would repay it and every penny of my father’s money. He also privately borrowed other large sums from some of his clients. His venture failed and we were left destitute. When he left for the UK he said that he would find work and put things right by supporting me and the children and repaying me and I trusted that he would. He told me to not say a word to anyone about his business or his debts here.
Since then he has admitted to his drink problem and to having ‘behaved appallingly’ and has apologised in writing but he has not supported me or repaid anything. After he met and moved in with his girlfriend he said he didn’t owe me anything. I became angry and wrote many letters to him, then he cut off all communications.
When he filed for divorce I had no money to live on or for a lawyer. After the Decree Absolute was granted I said if he didn’t settle up with me I would contact his other creditors. He then reported me to the police for harassment. His creditors, who had failed to find him or get a response from him then wrote to his employers. When they questioned him he told his employers I had written the letter and he showed them his complaint to the police.
Since then my ex’s lawyers have accused me of blackmail, harassment and libel and said they advised him to get an injunction against me and told me they would call report me to the police if I say anything about him or contact him ever again.
My husband's behaviour has caused me a great deal of distress and has also had a severely detrimental affect on our children.
There has been no answer to this yet so I have cut down and edited the paragraph about behaviour which now reads:
He has a long term problem with alcohol. In 1992 he lost control of himself and the effect that alcohol has on him. He became extremely volatile and unpredictable, was aggressive and controlling, used emotional blackmail and coercion. I was subjected to violent verbal and physical abuse and sustained injuries and was threaten with a knife. I called the police but never formally reported him or made a complaint. He had control of our business and personal finances.
In Spain my ex wanted to grow his business. I had to support the family and lend to him, he swore to repay everything including my father’s money. He also borrowed large sums from his clients. His venture failed leaving us with nothing. He returned to the UK saying he would repay me and support me and the children and told me to not tell anyone about his business or debts here.
He has not supported or repaid me. After he moved in with his girlfriend he claimed he didn’t owe me anything. I wrote many letters to him, then he cut off communications and filed for divorce. After the Decree Absolute I said I would contact his other creditors if he didn't settle up with me. He then reported me to the police for harassment. His creditors then wrote to his employers. He told them I had written the letter and showed them his complaint to the police.
My ex’s lawyers have accused me of blackmail, harassment and libel and advised him to apply to Court for an injunction against me and warned me not to say anything about him or contact him again or they would report me to the police.
My husband's behaviour and his lawyer’s have had a detrimental affect on the children and caused me a great deal of distress.
When we separated, the youngest had just turned seventeen, the next 20 and the eldest 22.
(I am aware that the law only takes into consideration children under 18. The point I am trying to make is that suddenly we no longer had a home or anything, the children were all in some sort of state, we were also in a foreign country in a deep recession where there is little in the way of welfare support).
You are brilliant! Yes I did get a bit carried away, I can see that now. This is a good exercise in being focussed! I greatly appreciate your positive words and encouragement.
I have filled in everything now except the last page.
Should I say anything in regards ***** ***** order sought? (5.1)
I would like a settlement order with a lump sum payment then there can be a clean break, if not I want spousal maintenance.
I will be travelling tomorrow but will be looking out for your answer so that I can finalize everything.
Ps. I will be giving you a huge thumbs up after all this help. God knows what I would have done without it.
Well now it is done!
If I could see you in person I would give you a huge hug and a bunch of flowers.
Thank you so much for your, help you have been incredible.
I hope you have a wonderful Christmas and a happy New Year, when no doubt I will be in touch again for the next stage.