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Ask Clare Your Own Question
Clare
Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 34278
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
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Re parental rights after separationMy partner of 6 years

Resolved Question:

Re parental rights after separationMy partner of 6 years and mother of my daughter who is almost 4, announced 10 days ago she is no longer in love with me and wants to separate.
We are a same sex couple.
I am on the birth certificate as the 2nd parent with the same rights as a father.
My now ex wants to move to Brighton and we currently own a house in South London.
This I believe is very unfair on our daughter and me.
I have been in my daughter's life since the day we planned her, I have been there through the IVF, the birth and each day since. I have played a big role to her development and I don't believe that moving so far is in the best interest for my daughter. It's in my ex' personal interest. She has another daughter from a previous relationship with a woman who is manipulative and horrible. She feels if she moves to Brighton she can be close to both her girls, however this is very selfish in my view.
Her other daughter is 8 years old and has lived away from her for the past 6 years. She is used to seeing her every other weekend. She will feel no impact from our separation, while my daughter will.My daughter needs both of us, equally and the fact she is the biological mother makes her believe she can do or go wherever she wants. Is this the case?
Where do I stand in this situation and can I stop her from going to Brighton?
She has also come very close to another women in Brighton so I think this is another reason she wants to move. All personal reasons, nothing to do with our daughter.The best for our daughter in my view is to have us both in her life equally. For us both to live nearby and to take care of her. I can't move to Brighton as I run a business in London and my ex currently works nearby. Also, as a single working mother she will need help with school drop offs, picks up, etc. I suspect she will ask her ex to do that, which I feel very against. I am the 2nd parent and I should be there for my daughter. It's really unfair to break up the family, take away my daughter and get people I do not approve of to look after her. It's not what I chose yet I have given all I can for this family up until now.
Where do I stand? What influence do I have? Can I apply for full custody or I have no chance? Can she just anywhere she likes with anyone she likes?
Thank you
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Clare replied 1 year ago.
HIThank you for your questionMy name is***** shall do my best to help you but I need some further information first.How is the care of the child currently shared between you?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
hello Clare and thank you
We still live together. We both take care of her equally. I drop her off and pick her up from nursery, i typically take her to weekend play dates and other activities while my ex tends to take her to Brighton and to her parents. We split all bills in 2. Does this answer the question?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
we are both full time working parents
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I run my business, and my office is 10 mins from our house and 5 mins from her nursery and school. I can be there if needed in no time. My ex is employed so she can;t just get out of work when she likes and also starts early quite often
Expert:  Clare replied 1 year ago.
Hi
You both have Parental Responsibility for your daughter and neither of you has more rights than the other
As parents you are expected to agree how the care of the child should be shared between you - using Family mediation if necessary
http://www.familymediationcouncil.org.uk/find-local-mediator/
If no agreement is reached then either parent can apply to the Court for a Child Arrangement Order stating what should happen.
Your arguments for the child remaining in her current school and home area are very strong and you have an excellent chance of success
I hope that this is of assistance - please ask if you need further details
Clare
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Thank you
So are you saying that she can't just go to Brighton if I object?
Does the court favour the birth mother? Say I want her to live with me...
What if she goes anyway?
Expert:  Clare replied 1 year ago.
Hi
Correct.
If you cannot agree then the Court will have to decide - and you can apply for a Prohibited Steps Order to prevent a move until the matter is resolved.
No the court will not necessarily favour a birth matter - it will be a question of what is best for the child
Clare
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