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Clare
Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 34105
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
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Firstly, thank you this service. My wife has

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Firstly, thank you for providing this service.
My wife has told me she is moving out and taking the children. We live in Sussex and she proposes moving to Dorset so I will be 3 hours from my kids. We married in 2003 and have two girls aged 8 and 10. There is no history of infidelity, domestic violence or drug abuse on either side. My wife(47) is a health visitor and I (48)am a teacher. We have an odd situation in that I teach in a private prep school and we live in the lodge house of the school free rent. This is as licensees only therefore my wife is the one who has to move as the property is tied to my job. The children attend the school and have done since they were 3. They are doing extremely well at school and love it. Were they to stay with me instead it would minimise the disruption that this split will cause. They will keep their home, their education, their friends and be with their father. I am a loving and good dad. I am trying to remain objective about what is best for them. I am well capable of looking after them - my school has already said they will accommodate any of my childcare needs and I already have the wife of a colleague who lives on site available to help with childcare. I have 18 weeks holiday per year. My children attend school every day until 5.45, except Wednesdays and every other Saturday which are 4pm finishes. My question is this - how likely is it that I might be awarded custody so that the children stay with me? Needless to say my wife is not happy with this proposal but I cannot see how any right minded person would not think that my proposal is in the best interests of the children
Thank you so much in advance.
Yours
Justin Gomm
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Clare replied 1 year ago.
HiThank you for your questionMy name is ***** ***** do my best to help you but I need some further information firstWhat is in Dorset for your wife?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
We both grew up there and she really wants to return. She will have her parents nearby who will provide some assistance for her. My mother lives 20 mins away but is infirm and 92
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
She will no doubt manage to find a small house to rent and get a job as a health visitor earning approx £28000 pa
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
The marriage has broken down irretrievably and we would probably divorce after 2 years with consent
Expert:  Clare replied 1 year ago.
Without asking them - what do you think the children would feel about the move?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
They would have very mixed feelings I think but on balance might well want to live here with me. I'm really not sure
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I would never ask them as I think it would be very unfair to put them on the spot to make a choice. However, once we have sat down to tell them that we are parting they may express a preference which should not be ignored.
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Both will be gutted to leave their school( which provides the most amazing education and opportunities) and all their friends.
Expert:  Clare replied 1 year ago.
That is fine - I think you have given it sensible consideration You and your wife both have parental responsibility for the chidlren which means that neither of you has the right to remove the children withoutthe agreement of the other parent or the courts.This is something you need to discuss with your wife using Family mediation - and if that is not successful then an applictaion may have to be made to the courtfor a Child Arrangement Order setting out how the children will share their time between you.Given that they are well settled at school it is likely that any shared care arrangement will be centered in the current area rather than in Dorset.Please ask if you need further detailsClare
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Thank you. What do I do if she removes the children without my consent? One more- do you consider that if she had a solicitor they would give her the same advice that you have given me?
Expert:  Clare replied 1 year ago.
If she removes the chidlren you should make an immediate applictaion to the court for an emergency order that the chidlren are returned to the area and their school whilst the decision about their final residence is decided.I can only say that they SHOULD give her the same advice
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
As an ex solicitor ( not family law) I know that they might not! Is it a police matter if she removes them without consent?
Expert:  Clare replied 1 year ago.
Sadly no.You would need to make an urgent applictaion to the Family Court
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