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Harris
Harris, Family Law Expert
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 2739
Experience:  Family Law - Specialist in Divorce, Financial Relief and Children Matters
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I am married to a man who tries to control everyone around

Resolved Question:

I am married to a man who tries to control everyone around him in particular me. He has not hit me but he psychologically does this by the way he treats me and talks to me and the children. He has been diagnosed also as high functioning aspergers.
I want to leave him as as well as this he has admitted to over 15 liaisons with men when he has engaged in sexual behaviour with them in public toilets as well as in the house.
Because of his behaviour I do not want him to have unsupervised access to the children, I have offered if he leaves to take the children around to see him regularly but I am concerned about what he will do.
He is French and I am concerned he may take them to France and try to keep them there.
We have been married for 13 years and do not own any property I am not looking for any support from him whatsoever in the future.
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Harris replied 1 year ago.
Hi, thank you for your question. Just a bit more information required to fully assist you:-Have the police or social services been involved?-How old are the children?-Are you still living in the same home with him?-Are you intending on pursuing a divorce?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Police and social services have not been involved
The children are 11, 9, 7 and 3
Yes at the moment but a house has come up for rent that I want to move into without him
A divorce depends on the advice I get I am not prepared to put the children at risk
Expert:  Harris replied 1 year ago.
Thanks. Upon separation a decision has to be made regarding who the children live with and how often they see the other parent. Given your concerns, you can start the negotiations for you to be their main carer - however, you will need to demonstrate that you will be able to adequately house them and support them. If you are unable to do this solely, then you are entitled to seek financial support from the father (this can be as child maintenance and financial relief arising out of the marriage.In the circumstances I would suggest that you make a referral to an independent mediator (you can find local ones here: familymediationcouncil.org.uk). The mediator will assist you both in reaching an amicable agreement that is in the children's best interests. The mediator will assist in relation to the children matter and the financial matter arising out of the marriage. If mediation does not help, then you will be able to pursue an application to court under Form C100 together with a £215 court fee to your local family court for a child arrangement order and once divorce proceedings have been issued you can pursue a financial relief application under Form A and a £255 court fee to the court. If you found this information helpful please provide a positive rating. I will not be credited for answering your question without a positive rating. Thank you
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