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Harris, Family Law Expert
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 1624
Experience:  Family Law - Specialist in Divorce, Financial Relief and Children Matters
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I separated from my husband a year ago, our son is nearly

Resolved Question:

hI i separated from my husband a year ago, our son is nearly two years old. the reason i left the home was because of his drinking a drug taking i wanted a better environment for my child. the arrangements we had were if he was sober he could see his son on a Saturday for 6 hours, this was never easy as he would tell me i was controlling and he was entitled to do as he pleased with his son. on occasions the baby would turn up home with a soaking nappy that had not been changed , an other occasion was he fed the baby chicken that had not been cooked correctly and took out in the hot sun with no protection.. he was sick for 3 day after ..
i advised him that he should maybe see his son on days out with me, he agreed until he decided to cause an argument,
the ex has now informed me he has been seeing a girl and she is now pregnant with his child ...
he has also told me that she has bipolar and is unstable and a nutter that has already had 2 children taken away ,she turns up at my ex house at late times screaming and shouting until he lets her in , she has also threatened me and my son, by my exes omissions he has said the both are drinking and taking drugs together. she has also contacted myself shouting ,screaming and threatening .
i do not want my son mixed up in all this and feel that my ex will not keep our son away from this person if he continues to have contact on his on on Saturdays.
i have offered for him to see him with myself but he is demanding time on his own with our son.. i have always offered to have him at my house so he can read with him, bath him have dinner and put him to bed , i would have gone to a friends , but he has declined...
he did not see his son on fathers day although i offered him time at the tiny tots play centre , he just insulted me. an told me i was playing god..
i really dont know what to do,
Submitted: 4 months ago.
Category: Family Law
Customer: replied 4 months ago.
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Expert:  Harris replied 4 months ago.

Hi, thank you for your question. Given the concerns you have it is reasonable for you to restrict the contact arrangements and ensure that your son is appropriately cared for and not at risk. However, the child is entitled to a relationship with the father and if you wish to progress this I would suggest that you make a referral to an independent mediator (you can find local ones here: The mediator will assist you both in reaching an amicable agreement that is in the children's best interests. If mediation does not help, then you will be able to pursue an application to court under Form C100 together with a £215 court fee to your local family court for a child arrangement order and the court can make a decision regarding the matter. For your information the Court will take into consideration the following when making a decision regarding the application:

1.The wishes and feelings of the child concerned
2. The child’s physical, emotional and educational needs
3. The likely effect on the child if circumstances changed as a result of the courts decision
4. The child’s age, sex, backgrounds and any other characteristics which will be relevant to the court’s decision
5. Any harm the child has suffered or may be at risk of suffering
6. Capability of the child’s parents (or any other person the courts find relevant) at meeting the child’s needs
7. The powers available to the court in the given proceedings

If you have any further questions regarding this please let me know. In the meantime if you found this information helpful please provide a positive rating using the stars at the top of this page. I will not be credited for answering your question without a positive rating. Thank you

Expert:  Clare replied 4 months ago.

Thank you for your question

My name is ***** ***** I shall do my best to help you

Your ex does indeed have Parental Responsibility for the child - but that does not give him the right to do things that place the child at risk

Given the history of his lack of care and his relationship with someone who has apparently been deemed a risk to his own chidlren you should offer contact at a local contact centre

If he refuses this then simply say that you are willing to discuss it with him at mediation if he wishes.

He will have to attend a mediation appointment if he wishes sto make an applictaion to the court for a Child Arrangement Order - and the court will only offer him what you have already offered so you have no cause to fear any court application

Please ask if you need further details

Expert:  Harris replied 4 months ago.

Hi, my colleague has helpfully reiterated the information that I had already provided you. If you found my information provided helpful please could you rate my response positively using the stars at the top of this page as I will not be credited for my response without a positive rating.

Harris, Family Law Expert
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 1624
Experience: Family Law - Specialist in Divorce, Financial Relief and Children Matters
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