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Harris
Harris, Family Law Expert
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 2541
Experience:  Family Law - Specialist in Divorce, Financial Relief and Children Matters
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My wife has serious anger issues, she doesn't admit it and

Customer Question

My wife has serious anger issues, she doesn't admit it and refuses to even acknowledge that, always blaming everyone and everything rather than admit she needs help.
I had started to file a divorce several times over the last 10 years, but what stopped me every time was my children I have 2 one aged 11 and the other aged 7 now - multiple times she threatened to take the children away, and my problem with that is she is very abusive (not in a physical way but an emotional way) - where she will scream at my daughter at pretty much anything and shame her for everything from her weight to her studying (even though she has passed nearly all the grammar school exams with flying colours) to her clothes, and would force them during holidays to study and Read for hours on end...it's only when I step in to stop her does she stop. (which is why I stayed with her this long).Now, I've stayed with my kids as I know no judge would take my side, I've read and seen enough cases to see how it goes, and my presence lessens what she does greatly - I take my kids under my wing, play with them and generally try and remove any effects of her behaviour - all in all it seemed to work to a point.recently that last few days she has become worse, I do not know why - and I'm worried what would happen to my kids if left them to her if I divorce her...My question is as follows: if I file for a divorce, or call social services, will my kids automatically be taken away from me as well ?
Submitted: 9 months ago.
Category: Family Law
Customer: replied 9 months ago.
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Customer: replied 9 months ago.
ok maybe I painted a bleaker picture than it really is - it's not bad when she's OK - it only occurs when she loses her temper, so we do tread carefully so as not to set her off, which works most of the time.
Expert:  Harris replied 9 months ago.

Hi, thank you for your question. If you pursue a divorce this will not mean that the children will be taken away from you. If you contact social services to report her behaviour they will need to investigate whether her behaviour is a risk to the children, and if it is they will consider other placements for them - for example yourself or other family members, and if there is an immediate emergency then they may be placed in foster care but this cannot be done without a police protection order or a court order.

I hope this assists you. If you found this information helpful please provide a positive rating using the stars at the top of this page. I will not be credited for your question without a positive rating. Thank you.,

Harris, Family Law Expert
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 2541
Experience: Family Law - Specialist in Divorce, Financial Relief and Children Matters
Harris and other Family Law Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 9 months ago.
will Social services wait until we're divorced to leave the kids with me ? I mean do I kick her out of the house or have some form of restraining order? I would go down the divorce and get the court to grant me the kids but I thought that courts no longer look into children, just finances
Customer: replied 9 months ago.
sorry if I sound muddled, probably because I am and have no idea what to do ? I'm terrified of a divorce, in case I lose my kids and they're left with her - she doesn't work and refuses to even learn English even though she's a pharmacist and has excellent prospects - she just stays at home which I think is bad for the kids let alone her mentality.
Expert:  Harris replied 9 months ago.

No, social services can get involved at any time and will only get involved if there is a risk to the children. The divorce will not instigate their involvement. If her behaviour continues to the extent that you and the children are at serious risk you can apply to court for a non-molestation order (an injunction) using form FL401 to your local family court.

If no agreement can be reached regarding arrangements for the children then either of you would be able to pursue a court application for the court to decide their arrangements.

Customer: replied 9 months ago.
but wouldn't the court side with her as she has no job ? and force me out of the house, I don't understand how they would leave a 7 yr old and 11 yr old with me if they do force me out ? isn't that how it normally works
Expert:  Harris replied 9 months ago.

No, just because she does not have a job does not mean she should remain in the property or the children should be placed in her care. The court will need to assess all the circumstances of the matter and decide what is in the children's best interests.

Customer: replied 9 months ago.
ok thank you
Expert:  Harris replied 9 months ago.

I hope this assists you. If you found this information helpful please provide a positive rating using the stars at the top of this page. I will not be credited for your question without a positive rating. Thank you.,

Customer: replied 9 months ago.
I have rated it 5 stars :)
thank you for your advise.
Expert:  Harris replied 9 months ago.

Thank you - I hope it goes well. If you have any questions in the future you can ask for me directly by starting your question For Harris

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