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Ask Clare Your Own Question

Clare
Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 33283
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
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What are my rights regarding my ex partner's new boyfriend

Customer Question

What are my rights regarding my ex partner's new boyfriend picking my children up from school???
Submitted: 29 days ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Clare replied 29 days ago.

Thank you for your question

My name is Clare

I shall do my best to help you but I need some further information first

How old are the children and how long has she known the new boyfriend?

Are there any existing court orders?

Customer: replied 29 days ago.
The children are 5 and 2. She has known him approximately 5months and there are no court orders in place
Customer: replied 29 days ago.
my father so the childrens Grandfather offered to pick the girls up when needed but instead she has her boyfriend to do it. I cannot as I work away from home Mon-Fri in order to afford everything
Customer: replied 29 days ago.
Are you still there Clare?
Expert:  Clare replied 29 days ago.

Do you have a specific problem with this man's suitability?

Customer: replied 29 days ago.
My children are everything to me and I just feel that I should have at least had a say in the matter due to it involving my children and somebody I have never met before and know nothing about. For all I know he could have previous convictions or anything. I just don't understand how it is deemed acceptable when my childrens own family have offered to pick them up?
Expert:  Clare replied 29 days ago.

Technically you can apply to the court for a Specific Issue Order to prevent him from collecting the child from school - but the fact that you yourself cannot take over the task could well be a problem - I am afriad the fact that your father could do it would not convince the court to take this step

Accordingly nnless you have some specific objection to this man (and you can make enquiries of the police using Sarah's Law - details here

https://www.nspcc.org.uk/services-and-resources/research-and-resources/factsheet-and-briefings/child-sex-offender-disclosure-scheme/)

then I am afraid it would be most unwise to make the application

Please ask if you need further details

Customer: replied 29 days ago.
in other words, if a father is concerned about his childrens well being it counts for nothing?? My two girls are the most precious aspect of my life and as a father surely I am within my rights to feel concerned about a total stranger to me been alone with them? Also, is there any law regarding how often/how long I can see my children??
Expert:  Clare replied 29 days ago.

Not at all - you are fully entitled to be concerned - and to discuss matters with your ex - and to find out from the police if you should be concerned.

All the law says is that a child is entitled to contact with both parents.

As Parents you need to agree how their time should be spent between you - using Family mediation is necessary.

An average pattern would be alternate full weekends plus one evening/night each week

But there is no such thing as "average" and you should discuss what works for the children

You may find this website useful

http://theparentconnection.org.uk/

Customer: replied 29 days ago.
thank you, ***** ***** your answers are really helping, its just that at the moment I see my girls 1day every 2week and personally feel its quite harsh on myself? but please tell me if I'm wrong
Expert:  Clare replied 29 days ago.

That seems very little - what excuse does your ex give for limiting contact in this way?

Customer: replied 29 days ago.
She says that she has to have a weekend with the girls for quality time. All I asked for is that day every 2week I have and then half a day either Sat or Sun the week in between so at least I get to see them a bit every week. Do you think there is any options for me or steps I could take to pursue this matter?
Expert:  Clare replied 29 days ago.

Why can you not have then for a weekend?

Customer: replied 29 days ago.
because she says I'm not having a full weekend as its not fair on her. Surely there is something I can do?
Expert:  Clare replied 29 days ago.

Do you have somewhere suitable for them to stay overnight?

Customer: replied 29 days ago.
I am currently back living with my father in a lovely house with a bedroom decorated and used for the girls. My mother passed away last April and she made sure there was a room for the girls
Expert:  Clare replied 29 days ago.

The law says that children are entitled to alcose relationship with both parents and the courts will enforce this of necessary.

Your ex does NOT have the right to simply dictate when you have the children - it is a matter to be decided between you - and you too are entitled to "quality time" with the children.

There is no reason why you should not aim for alternate weekends plus one evening/night in the week (assuming you can get them to and from school) plus up to half the school holidays.

The starting point is to arrange to see a Family mediator

www.familymediationehlpline.co.uk

If that fails then you can apply to the ocurt for a Child Arrangement Order using a form C100 and paying the fee of £215.

Customer: replied 29 days ago.
Thank you very much! That is a big help knowing that there is something I can do
Expert:  Clare replied 29 days ago.

You are most welcome - good luck

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