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Category: General
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I am concerned about my sister who is 13. I have selected the

Resolved Question:

I am concerned about my sister who is 13. I have selected the 'parenting' category for this question as I though it the most suitable one however as stated I'm an older (adult) sibling not a parent.
There are a few aspects to her behavior that are worrying me.
Anger - she gets very and uncontrollably angry and aggressive very easily and offten over very triviel things. She also offten gets angry with people for things for which they are not to blame. Flying into range is a daily occuance at the moment.
Worry and anxiety - she gets very worried and anxious over things including mostly trivial things. She is also very oversensitive and easily misreads things - convincing herself people are annoyed with her or don't like her etc. When this is not the case.
Quite offten after a very angry episode - after the rage has gone she gets hysterically upset. During this time she will say things like 'I always ruin everything for everybody' and 'everybody in the family hates me'. I find this especially upsetting.
I know her age is a difficult one for a lot of people but I am concerned.
Any general advice and thoughts much appreciated.
Thank you
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: General
Expert:  tazechip replied 2 years ago.
Hi. How long has she had these problems?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Hi,

Its difficult to be exact as I would say its been a build up but over the last 6 months or so it seems to have been getting worse.

Thanks

Expert:  tazechip replied 2 years ago.
OK.

How does she react if you discuss your concern about this with her?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Regarding the anger she normally is 100% sure in her own mind that someone was to blame for her reaction and that it was justified. I don't really think she would accept that she does have an anger issue. Again with the worry - if she is worried about something really relitivly trivial its difficult for her to be able to see that it isn't a big deal. She will think she has good cause to be worried about it!

Its worth pointing out that she isn't always angry or worried etc. She can be happy and have fun too.

Thank you

Expert:  tazechip replied 2 years ago.
So basically she doesn't think she herself has a problem?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

No she doesn't

Expert:  tazechip replied 2 years ago.
Are other members of the family concerned as you are?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Yes they are concerned but a lot of them do just attribute this to her age, being a teenage girl, going through a phase etc.

My feeling is at the moment all we are doing is dealing with the problems as they present day to day and maybe we need to look at the bigger picture of what could be going on

Expert:  tazechip replied 2 years ago.
I understand.

One last question--could there have been anything that happened to her on or around the time that this began?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

There really isn't anything that I am aware of

Expert:  tazechip replied 2 years ago.
OK. While this may just be a "teenage" thing and due to fluctuating hormones, the best thing to do here would have her seen by a clinical psychologist for an evaluation and therapy is that is felt warranted.

It definitely sounds like an anger management problem but she may also be dealing wit an anxiety/depression situation.

Hopefully she'd agree to being seen

Let me know if you need any more information
tazechip and 20 other General Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Thank you for you helpful advice

Expert:  tazechip replied 2 years ago.
My pleasure