Thank you for your reply.
So this still may be a long process for me. In the mean time, if I travel with all the paper work, and proof of my husbands work, our marrige, ect, can they arrest me or detain me in an immigration prison?
Would it help to have a letter from a solicitor stateing my right of work and that I do not need to be removed from the country, that I have the right to live in this country? Every door is being shut in my face, even though by law I've done nothing wrong.
No, they should not put you in prison or detain you. As a general rule we try to avoid doing that to people without good reason in the UK. You have the right to enter the UK as the partner of an EEA citizen exercising his treaty rights. If you travel with your marriage certificate, a couple of bills to show you are both currently living together and evidence of your husbands current employment then you should still be allowed to enter the UK. Border control are very well aware of the freedom of movement laws as they relate to partners - you simply need to make sure that you can prove the two key requirements - that the EEA national is working and that your marriage subsists.
I think you should look at things more positively. You have thus far applied for the wrong type of visa and applied without sufficient evidence - neither of these situations are the fault of the authorities BUT the law is not stopping you from being in the UK. If you were married to a British Citizen then you would have a far more serious situation at greater cost.
All you need to do is make a new application (this would be my preferred option) or pursue the appeal. Either course of action will require you to provide the evidence of employment during the qualifying period that should have been supplied in the first place. There are no fees for EEA applications so at least it is not costing you money to apply again. When you give the authorities what they need to make the decision then they will make the decision that you want - without the required evidence they cannot give you the decision that you want.