How JustAnswer Works:
  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site. Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.
Ask James Mather Your Own Question
James Mather
James Mather,
Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 22624
Experience:  Senior Partner at Berkson Wallace
11292137
Type Your Law Question Here...
James Mather is online now

I split up from my ex partner just over a year ago and together

Customer Question

I split up from my ex partner just over a year ago and together we have a daughter who will be 2 in April. The break up wasn't my choice but due to my work commitments of running my own business that was 60 miles away from home and the long hours I did, this wasn't enough for her and she told me I couldn't be a father to our daughter and ended our relationship. I was never abusive or threatening in our time. Long story short I get to see my daughter 2 hours on Saturday morning in my ex partners house. I can't take her out, my family have seen my daughter only twice and none of my friends have. At Christmas she told me that I would never be my daughters father but a visitor and no more and that I would never have her Xmas, be involved in her school plays and sports days when she is older and will only let her stay with me when she is about 7 years of age and that is then if my daughter wants. I pay maintenance direct to her and have never missed a payment and have all records.
My problems are this isn't fair nor right, I'm not having a relationship with my daughter that I dearly want and she is trying all she can to keep away out of her life as she grows up.
My question is if I went to court could I have aright to more time and have her for every third weekend say. I'm not trying to change my daughters life and be unreasonable I just want to have a life with my daughter.

Kind regards

Dave
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Law
Expert:  James Mather replied 4 years ago.
Do you have parental responsibility?
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
I am named on the birth certificate so I believe so
Expert:  James Mather replied 4 years ago.


Contact in your ex's house is completely
unsatisfactory unless you agree which obviously you don't, but are being forced
to put up with.

At two years of age, there is no reason why
you should not be having more contact then this, and there is no reason why you
should have to wait until the child is 7 years old for overnight staying contact.



It would also not be unreasonable for you to
have your daughter every other Christmas even if it is not for the whole period.



You
should try to resolve matters using family mediation http://www.familymediationhelpline.co.uk/find-service.php



Although
it is quicker and less confrontational than court it isnt necessarily cheaper





If this fails then you can apply to the court for a
defined contact order which will formalise arrangements.

The necessary forms are available on the here

http://www.thecustodyminefield.com/

It would actually be a good idea if she saw solicitor because it could save
a whole load of arguing.


Can I help further? Please don't forget to
positively rate my answer service (even if it was not what you wanted to hear)
and I will follow up any further points you raise for free. If you don't rate
it positively, then the site keep your deposit and I get 0 for my time. If in
ratings you feel that you expected more or it only helped a little, please ask
me for further info before rating me negatively otherwise I don't get paid at
all for my time and answer.

The thread remains open. Thanks

PS Please bear with me over the weekend because I will be online and off-line


James Mather and other Law Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
Thank you for your reply it certainly has made me feel more positive. In the eyes of the law would I looked upon favourably to the fact I want to see more daughter as much as I do but I'm restricted. I want in place within a calender maybe a weekend stay at mine, have her for one week day during the month while she as work and do things with my daughter where she lives and also ever other Saturday visit. That way I believe I get enough time with my daughter and my ex can be happy I'm also out the way for some of her weekends. Surely her behaviour towards me not being able to be her dad can't be looked at as anything good in the interests of our daughter?
Expert:  James Mather replied 4 years ago.
Agreed and court belive that children should grow up knowing both pareents. I hope you get it sorted. It might be worth speaking to a solicitor who will reinforce things for you. It is always better to discuss things with the ex first if you can.