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Jo C.
Jo C., Barrister
Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 30929
Experience:  Over 5 years in practice
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My wife suddenly decided after 15 years that I did not meet

Customer Question

My wife suddenly decided after 15 years that I did not meet her emotional needs. And while she is seeing a bloke, which she claims is purely to have a laugh and fun, but nothing else, has told me that she doesn't know if she could love me again. In the meantime, we are living in the same house with our two kids, until she decides whether to give me a second chance or to take a hike. Clearly I am waiting for my sentence and after 2 months, no word yet and living like this is no fun. She is going thru menopause hence the reason why I have given ger some room. What the best advice
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Law
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Thank you for your question.
I am uncertain whether you are looking for legal or relationship advice - could you clarify this for me please?
Claire
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Legal advise please!
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
I will need some further information in order to assist you.
How much is the house worth and how much is outstanding on the mortgage?
What other assets and debts are there and how much do you each earn?
How old are the children and who has their day to day care?
Claire
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
The house is worth £1.5 and mortgage of £750k.
Outstanding Debts £50k. We own another flat, which we rent for £3800 x month. The asset is worth £100k. We also have investment in a freehold scheme, which in the long term could be worth over £1 mil.
She earns £105,000 I'm self employed and earn around £80k with dividends.

The children are 5 1/2 and 4 1/2 and she has the day to day care as she only works 2 days a week, with the other days doing trading from home.
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Very hard question I know - but do you wish to end the marriage?
Claire
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
NO, but it's not up to me. As she needs to decide whether to give the marriage another go or not. From my side I just want to be prepared for the inevitable, should she decide to give it up! Perhaps giving it more time is always an option. But the fact that she is comparing me with a bloke 20 years younger than I is going to make that decision. Much harder I think! What are your thoughts? I know you re not a psychologist, but thought that you might have dealt with similar cases and can advise accordingly!

Cheers,
Tony
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
You are in what is always an emotionally draining position - with all the power out of your hands.
In order that I can assess your financial position (probably not your major concern) what is the value of the Investment scheme NOW
Claire
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
The investment scheme has limited value until tenants buy the freehold, which is usually during a sale of a flat. As an example, when we bought the flat that we currently leave in, we paid almost £200k for a share of the freehold, of which we got back around £50k as we hold approx. 25% in the Freehold company.again, it has no value up until someone decides to buy the freehold.
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Would you wish to move into the Flat that you own in the longer term?
Claire
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Possibly, but we have a tenant with another 2 years to go on the Agreement.
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Assuming that the matrimonial home was sold how much woudl your ex need to rehouse herself and the children in the same general area?
Claire

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