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Ask Clare Your Own Question

Clare
Clare, Solicitor
Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 33282
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practice since 1985 with a wide general experience.
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After 16 years of marriage I found out my husband has been

Customer Question

After 16 years of marriage I found out my husband has been having an affair. I confronted him and he lied about it. I then hacked into his Ipad and read their conversations confirming that they not only were having an affair, but that they did so in the marital home! He has moved back in with his parents before he moves in with her as he husband has to completely move out as well.

When we first got married I brought a large sum of money into the relationship and not only paid for the wedding, but paid off his negative equity and put a down payment on our home. During the whole of the marriage I have always earned more than him, affording us with a comfortable lifestyle.

He had always wanted to have his own business and I encouraged this and always found some money from the household budget to help him. He started the company a couple of months after we got married. Five years ago he was suffering from stress and wanted to quit his day job and work at his own business full time. This put lots of pressure on me, but I agreed with the stipulation that after three years we would sit down and see if it was paying for itself and contributing to the household. He agreed to this.

For the past two years it has been hell. He has refused to talk about it always saying how the company was increasing its business year on year, etc. etc. But the fact remained that no money was ever coming into the household. Our relationship became non existent and several times I asked him if he wanted to either go for counselling or to get a divorce. He said no to both.

Then, this past September he got back in touch with his first girlfriend and all the lies and deceit started. They planned on dragging this out for 3 years so I could continue to support him and in three years our daughter would have finished college.

I have said that I just want him to sign the house over to me and pay me some child support. He has refused and says I am only entitled to 2/3 of the house and that he wants me to sell it when I retire and for him to get his money. I told him that I am entitled to half of his company and half of his pension but that I will settle for just the house. In going through the bank statements of our joint account I can see that he has been having his National Insurance as well as many other 'company' expenses taken out of there. He has been charging his company, but has never reimbursed me.

I would like to know if I can claim for all of the time and money I have invested into this company and what are my rights?

Thank you.
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Law
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Thank you for your question
I shall do my best to assist you but I need some further information first.
How much is the property worth and how much is outstanding on the mortgage?
What is the value of the other assets and what income does he actually have
Claire
Customer: replied 3 years ago.


The property is worth about £165,000 with only about £16,000 outstanding. There are no other assets to speak of. Everything he wanted I gave to him, but I am left with most of the furniture, etc. We have already got rid of the joint account. His income for this last year was £11,000 profit from his company.


 

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
What income do you have?
Claire
Customer: replied 3 years ago.


I had just recently cut my hours down so I could open my own business. My job pays me about 11,500 a year and I have just opened the Community Scrapstore at the same time that this whole thing reared its ugly head and I haven't had a penny out of it yet. So I feel like I'm between a rock and a hard place.

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Does the business actually have a value in itself?
Claire
Customer: replied 3 years ago.


Yes it does, but I don't know how to value it. I accept the fact that it wouldn't be a business without him as much of the revenue taken is from his knowledge and skills as a webdesigner/handwriting analysis, etc.

Customer: replied 3 years ago.


The fact that you are on the east coast of the US, how can you answer questions about English law?

Customer: replied 3 years ago.


How about an answer? It's been almost an hour.


 

Customer: replied 3 years ago.


Now I am getting pissed off. An hour and a half and no reply. Time to get my money back!! You have done nothing but ask me for more information. I will be contacting MasterCard and cancelling my payment to you if I do not have a response in the next 15 minutes!

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
I am sorry for the delay but I had to go offline.
Whilst the site owners are on the East Coast of the US I am in the East Midlands of the UK!
At the moment I am asking for information to try and give you the best possible way forward in what could otherwise be a grim position
You refer to his pension - do you both have pensions and if so how much are they worth?
Claire
Customer: replied 3 years ago.


His pension is worth more than £100,000 mine is only worth a pittance in comparison.

Customer: replied 3 years ago.


I think the problem is that I am 7 1/2 years older than him and have only been in this country since just before we got married. My pension has only been running for about 15 years whereas his has been going for over 30 years.

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Could you confirm how long you actually lived together for?
Claire
Customer: replied 3 years ago.


I moved over here permenantly in July 1996. We married November 1996 and were together until 7 May 2013.


 

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Did you specifically move here to marry him?
Claire
Customer: replied 3 years ago.


Yes I did. I am still an American citizen.

Customer: replied 3 years ago.


Claire, I am going to assume that you are now closed for the night. I look forward to reading your next reply tomorrow morning.

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
The length of your relationship means that the starting point for division of all the assets is 50/50.
The fact that you are older, left your country to come here and that you brought the bulk of the capital to the marriage does assist you in increasing your share - and your ex;'s 70/30 split in your favour is not unrealistic
You have a claim on half of the pension for the years
that you were together - so your claim is for about 25% of it.
It woudl appear that is business is basically him which makes it unlikely that it has any real value in itself
He does indeed have to pay child maintenance
I am sorry that this is mixed news but I hope that it does give you a guide for the negotiations.
You could try discussing matters with him using Family Mediation (www.familymediationhelpline.co.uk) to try and avoid long drawn out court proceedings
Please ask if you need any further information
Claire

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