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Clare
Clare, Solicitor
Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 33319
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practice since 1985 with a wide general experience.
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I have been split from my ex wife since the end of last year,

Customer Question

I have been split from my ex wife since the end of last year, I have served in the army for 13 years and have just decided to take voluntary redundancy, she is now saying that she will not sign the final divorce papers unless I offer her some of this money as well even though she ale
Ready has been offered a share of my pension and I am paying csa for my children who I will now be able to also see regularly as I am due to move from Germany back to the uk. There have been numerous problems with regards XXXXX XXXXX over the years she run up about 30,000.00 worth of debts, some due to online gambling which she has a problem with, and also since we have spilt has been helping herself sometimes without my consent to money from my bank accounts as she knows I'm not very good at keeping track of them and it has been difficult to as I have been in Germany and also have done exercises in Bavaria and Canada for quite some time. She is claiming benefits and has been since we split and also rcieving csa from myself however I believe she hasn't declared any of the extra money she has had/taken of which I have proof of most of it through bank statements etc. the divorce is based on myself admitting adultery which at the time I felt was the right thing to do however it wasn't as straight forward as that as she has caused numerous problems and stress for me over the years even resulting in problems within my army career of me not being able to gain promotions and also caused trouble at the base we were at the the time with other army wives and my colleagues, which meant I had to even move company's and locations, and all this while I was on tour of Afghanistan so as you can imagine they were extremely stressful times for me as it was. She has also now got a new partner and has completely relocated the children away from her and my family to be with, who is in her words to my mother is very well of and has given her a car and alosorts of help which I also don't think she has declared to the benefits office. She is sat
Yang she will fight me for part of my redundancy which I think due to all these circumstances is completely unfair and I feel that she shouldn't be entitled to as this is for me to now resettle into civilXXXXX XXXXXfe and I have nothing to show for the years of earnings I have been through within my career, she walked away with all possessions/ furniture etc. any advice would be very much appreciated as this is becoming very hard for me to deal with. Many thanks in advance.
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Law
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Thank you for your question.
My name is Claire and I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
How long were you living together and how old are the children.
What assets and debts are there and how much will your payment be?
Claire
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Hi, thank you for your reply, we were living together/married for 12 years. The children Are 5, 10 and 12. I do not have exact figures at hand at present altho I can access this this evening but roughly a 25,000.00 consolidation loan has been paid by myself with 1,800.00 still outstanding. This was due to numerous things being taken on finance and things such as catalogue bills etc by her. And there was a further loan payed by myself for 5,000.00 for the same kind of reasons. Also there is 3,000.00 of gambling debts she incurred that I paid for which I have proof of. And and 1,800.00 bill which I had to pay where we moved from our army rented property when split. Also like I said she has taken money from accounts etc which I have asked for copies of statements to be able to find out how much. All this has been on top of me paying csa and also buying things for the children they have needed like school uniforms etc, and treating them whilst I have had them. Also of course I have incurred solicitors fees for the divorce. There are no assets or savings/property etc, she can have a percentage of my pension which I have offered, my redundancy is 34,000.00 and 10,000.00 resettlement leave.
Many thanks,
Ryan.
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
How recently has she removed monies from the accounts - and roughly how much?
Claire
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
It has been up until a couple of months ago when I was finally able to freeze the accounts and stop her access to them etc,
I do not have an exact figure until I receive the statements to add it up but I think roughly it could be into the 1,000.00/2,000.00 mark.
Ryan.
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
What housing provision does she have for herself and the children
Claire
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
I believe she is either privately renting or has been given local authority housing of a 4 bedroom house. Like I sai she is receiving benefits so has her rent paid for etc, and also she chose to relocate to be with/ near her partner. Which also incurred numerous extra costs that she wouldn't have had if she would have stayed where she was.
Ryan.
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi Ryan
How long were you in the army and what pension share have you offered?
Claire
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
I have been in for 12 years and 6 months. And I have offered 50% as advised previously that she is entitled to that much.
Ryan.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Just to add I have worked out the amount she has taken from the account since we split is £6,508.00. And as said before this has been on too of csa payments I have made and also helping toward things for the children such as school uniforms and trips etc.
Many thanks,
Ryan.
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Your pension offer is spot on.
My concern is the lack of other capital which makes it more likely that the court will see the need to make a lump sum order in her favour from your redundancy package - but not necessarily half of it
If you can prove that she has had this capital (as well as child maintenance)then there is a reasonable chance that the court will say that she has had a lump sum.
There is however no guarantee that the court will take this approach and on that basis negotiating an agreed settlement could be cheaper - possibly using Family mediation (www.familymediationhelpline.co.uk)
Whilst disappointing I hope this is useful - please ask if you need further details
Claire

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