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Jo C.
Jo C., Barrister
Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 69361
Experience:  Over 5 years in practice
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Hello I dated this girl for a short while... it ended physically

Customer Question

Hello

I dated this girl for a short while... it ended physically when i became quite sick but we remained very close. 6 weeks ago we had a ten hour conversation ... i thought it would take a few minutes!!! Basically shes met someone else but has been giving me very mixed signals.

She told me that despite being with someone else she cant stop thinking about me & is frustrated that she doesnt know why she cant be with me.

She loves the area that i live in & was looking to live here somewhere. All summer she begged me to live with her but i said no as the emotions between us are somewhat confusing & it wouldnt be healthy.

Last friday she moved to a property directly opposite me... when i had asked her to give both me & her time and space.

I feel so betrayed & anxious that shes living opposite me that ive decided to move... what else can i do!!!?

My question is that i want to write her & her sister a joint letter of how betrayed i feel & also that i wish to have absolutely no contact with them.

Can i get into trouble by writing such a letter?? I believe the girl i dated is a pyschopath & with her living directly opposite me i feel threatened & scared of what ever she can do next


Sounds like drama i know but what sane person moves directly opposite an ex lover whilst declaring strong feelings for you but seeing someone else...
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Law
Expert:  Jo C. replied 3 years ago.
Hi.

Thank you for your question. My name is XXXXX XXXXX I will try to help with this.

What are you hoping to achieve by doing this please?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Ok... first off im a professional like you... a doctor & the grown up thing to do would be to move, block all contact & move on.


 


Ive been deceived, lied to & manipulated & feel as anyone would do horrified in what theyve done... i feel unsafe in my own home... scared that im going to bump into them ... particularly with her new lover knowing what i know!!


 


So what to i hope to achieve by writing a letter is to have my closure... to relay how disgusted i am in the both of them for not giving the space anyone would deserve.... for evading my personal space & my home... for forcing me to move to get that distance to move on in my life from the conflicting messages... in essence i want to put my feelings down on paper but am scared to do so as im not sure if i can get into trouble by doing so... if i tell someone they are a cheat, manipulator & lier is that going to get me into jot water if its a personal letter?

Expert:  Jo C. replied 3 years ago.
Thank you.

Its really not a good idea. It could amount to a malicious communication. That offence is used rather liberally these days. There are lots of lesser communication offences that might apply as well.

Obviously most people would not report something like that but there are childish people about with nothing better to do than call the police because it is free to do.

If you are concerned that she will harass you then it would be much better to just ignore her completely. If she does misbehave then report it to the police. Then you will have the law on your side.

The alternative is that you play into her hands, she will make a report to the police and convince everybody that she is the victim. There are a lot of people about who are quite good at that.

I'm sorry this isn't the answer you wanted but it is the position that you face and I have a duty to inform you truthfully.

Hope this helps. Please let me know if you need more information.

Jo
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Hi


 


I know that what im dealing with is a psychopath of a high functioning nature which leaves a bitter bitter taste... moving opposite me (directly) was not a mistake but chosen to hurt & disorientate & to make me feel uncomfortable & essentially move because thats how their minds work once they have moved on & triangulated.


 


 


Of the whole of london ... & moves opposite & i cant protect myself or have freedom of speech because the law protects them.


 


Your answer clarifies what i thought & what i have read so thank you...


 


I save lives & the law protects the insane

Expert:  Jo C. replied 3 years ago.

Yes, of course you are. She is exactly the type of person that will start phoning the police and making wildly exaggerated allegations or true allegations of a very trivial nature. She is what is know at the Bar as a vexatious accuser. You will find a very interesting article on the point here http://www.1itl.com/news/270/ Welcome to my world! The law protects the person who calls the police first on the whole. That isn't anything like the same thing as being the victim. The question though is whether you are going to play into her hands or to play your hand more carefully.

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