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Ask Clare Your Own Question
Clare
Clare, Solicitor
Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 34233
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practice since 1985 with a wide general experience.
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Me and the father of my son recently split up and because hes

Customer Question

Me and the father of my son recently split up and because he's not from birmingham he went back to his hometown.He wants to fetch my son and take him to his hometown for a few days but i feel my son is to young to be away from me as he is only 19 months old.Plus ive had abusive messages off his new gf...what can i do please?
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Law
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare
I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
has your son ever stayed away from you before?
Did your ex share the care of the child while you were together?
What contact has he had since you split up?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Hiya,No my son hasn't stayed away from me before.His dad did share the care when we was together as we lived together.Since we split up he's come back to see him twice.I just worry that if he goes with his dad for a few days his dad won't bring him back.

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
How long have you been separated?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

We split up on 18th Feb and he saw his son a few times between then and 9th March when he moved back to Bedford.Then been back to see him twice.

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Three months is a long time when you are only 19 months old and on that basis taking the child away when he has only seen him a handful of times is not reasonable.
You should offer to discuss contact with your ex using Family mediation (www.familymediationhelpline.org.uk) so that you can establish a regular pattern of visiting contact in your area and discuss how to build up to overnight contact.
If your ex does not accept this then it is for him to apply to the Court for a Child Arrangement Order.
If he does that then you can ask the court to state that the child lives with you so that you can be sure that the child is returned
You can read more on these sites
http://theparentconnection.org.uk/
http://www.familylaw.co.uk/system/uploads/attachments/0000/2078/CB1_1108.pdf
I hope that this is of assistance - please ask if you need further details
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Thankyou for your advice u've put my mind at ease as don't want to stop my sons dad from seeing him but don't feel he's ready for overnight contact yet due to being so young.

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
That is very wise - I hope all goes well
clare