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Ask Clare Your Own Question
Clare
Clare, Solicitor
Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 34276
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practice since 1985 with a wide general experience.
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Hi there, I wonder if you can help. I was with my ex partner

Customer Question

Hi there, I wonder if you can help. I was with my ex partner for 6 years, (not married) We separated over a year ago and have a six year old daughter together. Today, my ex partner advised that she was moving on with a new partner. As any father would be concerned on their daughters well being, I made a few enquiries on who this person was, their employment status, lifestyle etc. she advised me that I did not need to know any of this information and was to mind my own business. This let to me having a rather irate conversation with her whereby she warned me that she would have me charged for harassment.

My daughters well being is a number one priority to me and pay more than sufficient maintenance, look after her during the weekends, occasionally weekdays and of course holidays. I have also brought up her son from a previous relationship who I also consider my son and pay for occasional essentials and have him stay with me as often as my daughter.

I would like to know my rights on this sensitive situation. Can you help??

Kind regards,

Liam.
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Law
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare
I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
Do you mean that she is moving in with her new partner?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Hi there,

Apologies, I meant that she has started a new relationship with another person. Not moving in to the same household.
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Did she tell you his name?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
No, she refuses to give me any information.
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Do you know how long they have been going out?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
I have no idea, not long I think
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Have the children met him?
Clare
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Not yet, but will shortly I presume.
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
There is sadly no requirement for her to tell you even his name - let alone the another information you have requested.
Common courtesy alone means that she shoudl tell you their name - and in fact of you did apply to the court it is likely that se would be ordered to do so - but nothing else - you are simply not entitled to that level of information UNLESS you are aware of something about that person which gives rise for concern.
Rather than risk the unpleasantness of a court application I would suggest that you email your ex and apologise for going over the top - and ask if there could be an agreement that you each inform the other of the name of any new partner.
You could offer to discuss this with her using Family mediation (www.familymediationhelpline.co.uk)
Please ask if you need further details
Clare
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
I am sorry that you felt my service was poor meaning that I get no credit for my time but which is not necessary for and does not trigger a refund.
EquallY i am sorry that I could not give you the answer that you wanted - but the simple fact is that your ex does NOT HAVE to give you the details that you seek - albeit that I believe it would be more than reasonable to expect her to do so
Sadly I can only tell you the law as it stands
Clare
Clare and other Law Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Hi Clare,

Thanks for your answer. You must understand how frustrating this is for me. I am unsatisfied with the law unfortunately, which is not your fault. Can you advise me on where I stand financially with my stepson, baring in mind that he is in my care at the same time as my daughter.

Regards,

Liam
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
HI
I do understand your frustration
Since you were not married and the child is not biologically yours you have no liability to pay maintenance for him
Clare