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Clare
Clare, Solicitor
Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 33325
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practice since 1985 with a wide general experience.
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hi my son and his ex separated 6 years go she now lives with

Customer Question

hi my son and his ex separated 6 years go she now lives with her partner and they have 1 child and another due new year. my son has travelled by plane and train every two weeks and has his sons stay 4 nights with him also he has them during holidays. The oldest child is now due to change to secondary education and wants to go to a school near his dads home as he and his little brother are very unhappy living in their mum's house (she has told them that they are not her favourites) What can we do to fulfil the boys wishes their dad does not want to isolate them from their mum and would fund and accommodate overnight stays with her
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Law
Expert:  Nicola-mod replied 2 years ago.
Hello,
I've been working hard to find a Professional to assist you with your question, but sometimes finding the right Professional can take a little longer than expected.
I wonder whether you're ok with continuing to wait for an answer. If you are, please let me know and I will continue my search. If not, feel free to let me know and I will cancel this question for you.
Thank you!
Nicola
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Carry on searching.

Expert:  Nicola-mod replied 2 years ago.
Hello,
We will continue to look for a Professional to assist you.
Thank you for your patience,
Nicola
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare
I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
How old are the children and how long does he have in the holidays?
How far apart do they live?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
The boys are 10 and 7.
In the summer he has them for 3.5 weeks or half the summer break, whichever is the longer. For half-terms they generally switch over half-way through, handing over midday on a Wednesday. At Christmas and Easter it's more complicated: Christmas they alternate 22 to 27 Dec each year; similar at Easter. Since my son sees them for only 4 nights out of 14 in term- time he has been asking for a greater proportion of the school holidays.
My son works and shares a flat in Belfast. The boys reside with their mother in Cardiff. He sees them every second weekend during term-time picking them up after school on Thursday in Cardiff and returning them to school on the Monday morning. He rents a flat in Newport to parent the boys and he works remotely (via the internet) during the 5 days he is away from his office.
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
So moving schools will in fact mean moving countries?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
No. Both places are in the UK.
The older boy was born in Southampton. They moved to Dromore Co Tyrone when he was two. The younger boy was born in Enniskillen. She moved out of the family home when he was two taking both boys with her. She lived in Omagh for a year and then moved to Cardiff. Both boys have said they are unhappy living with her and that they think she doesn't love them. Are they old enough yet for their wishes to be taken into account? If so, how? They are not yet divorced. Could the residency arrangements be reviewed as part of divorce proceedings?
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
My apologies - I meant that the children currently live and goes to school in Wales - if the elder boy moved he would be in Northern Ireland?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

He has expressed a wish to go to school in Enniskillen.

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
Does he have a good friendship group there?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
The elder boy has lost friends with every move she has made and moving mid-year to Cardiff reduced his chances of being accepted by the more established members of his class. He has had difficulty making friends everywhere since he behaves somewhat like his mother. Being in Northern Ireland only during the school holidays for the last four years has limited his opportunities to make friends, but his father and grandmother have ensured that he has a playdate with children of his own age as often as possible. The two best friends he had in school in Cardiff have left the school and moved away diminishing further his sense of self esteem. He made his first communion in Co Fermanagh and was made welcome by the pupils and teachers of the local primary school at the time. He will be rejoining them for his confirmation in 2015, and has said he'd like to go to secondary school with them.
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
The starting point is for your son to try and discuss matters with his ex using Family Mediation and a mediator trained to work with young people so that the child's wishes can be brought to the discussion.
If that does not succeed then your son will have to apply to the court for a Child Arrangement Order and for a Specific issue Order to allow for the change of school
I have to say that this will not be an easy application to win because of the substantial changes involved - however that does not mean that it is not winnable - just that your son must prepare his case carefully
I hope that this is of assistance - please ask if you need further details
Clare

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