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Ask Clare Your Own Question

Clare
Clare, Solicitor
Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 33297
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practice since 1985 with a wide general experience.
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My Friend left the marital home eight months ago with their

Customer Question

My Friend left the marital home eight months ago with their two children because she was being abused (verbally) all the time and was treated like a bought wife, was forced to return as he was only paying a small amount of money infrequently for the kids and she couldnt affort rent / food etc.. During these eight months he has threatened, abused and harrased her beyond anything normal. He took back the car she was driving, making it almost impossible for the school run and ended up using taxis He has spent The last twelve of sixteen weeks out of the country on holiday and hasnt cared about the children, as soon as she returned to the home he came back to the UK. He waited until she was away for a night, went through all of her belongings, initially threw all of her clothes in the garden and her food in the bin. went through all of her online accounts including Facebook and was texting people who had shown interest in her including myself with offensive texts from her account.

She is scared to stay but needed to try and sort out the divorce with him and give stability to the kids, it was his house before they married six years ago and everything is in his name, she has spoken to a solicitor who has advised her there is nothing that can be done and he has a right to live there, but surely if there is a chance he could hurt her, which is possible with his temper and drinking habbits or cause her and the children emotional distress then is there anything she can do to get him out while she tries to divorce him, which is hard as there isnt legal aid anymore? and is there any charities that can support her with the divorce? (she was from Thailand and was brought over here by him after they married, she does have a perminant visa to stay)

Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Law
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare
I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
How old are the children?
is she willing to start divorce proceedings?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Hi Clare,

Thank you for the responce

The Children are two and five and she started divorce proceedings three months ago and he was sent a letter by her solicitor advising him that she was starting, it also contained a request for him to stop the abusive texts and calls, which he totally ignored. She is in the process of providing a financial statement, but due to the lack of heer monies is struggling to pay the solicitor and is causing this situation to get worse by the day.

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
How far have the divorce proceedings reached - has she issued a petition?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Yes, She has issued a pettition and requested a financial statement from him. She has also put a mark on the home to prevent the sale of it.

The only other thing that has been suggested is mediation, but this isnt going to help the current situation short term and without any monies being given, she is stuck.

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
Has there been any direct physical violence - if so when was the last incident?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Nothing physical for a number of years, but the verbal abuse has been extreme, threats on her life, hundreds of texts, she worked for a while when she found tempory accomidation to pay the rent, but he came to her place of work and had to be ejected. she is consistantly watched by his friends and a photo have previously been sent to her of her at work.

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
Who has the day to day care of the children?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

She has always looked after the kids and he has given little time to them, when she seperarted for the eight months the kids went with her and he would have them infrequently for a night here and there.

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
OK.
Has the Decree Nisi been applied for?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Hi,

No, she is filling out her financial statement at the moment

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
That is a separate issue.has her husband filed the acknowledgement of service yet?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

He is refusing to do anything and is in denial about the fact that she wants a divorce and wont accept that he could lose anything, he wants her to stay with him and is trying to make it as difficult as he can to ensure that she doesnt stay in the house.

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
What ground has she used for the divorce - Unreasonable behaviour?
Clare
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Hi,

Yes that is the reason stated on the petition

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Hi
In that case all she has to do is arrange for him to be served personally - then she can apply for the Decree nisi.
She needs to instruct her solicitor to get on with this.
She also needs to actually start the financial application - her ex is not going to settle this voluntarily.
In fact his behaviour could be enough for her to get an order excluding him from the property
details here
http://www.marilynstowe.co.uk/2012/06/01/domestic-violence-how-to-apply-for-an-occupation-order-by-nastassia-burton/
Womens aid can also offer her some support
www.womansaid.org.uk
I hope that this is of assistance - please ask if you need further details
Clare

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