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Buachaill
Buachaill, Barrister
Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 10623
Experience:  Barrister 17 years experience
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There, I got physically involved with a female acquaintance

Resolved Question:

Hello there,
I got physically involved with a female acquaintance of mine that I have known for over 5 years but have not been in a relationship with. I also told her that I was seeing someone else and that we are getting married. We go to the same church.
When she heard last weekend that I am getting married, she says she had to confess to two people at church that she and I were involved; that she is going to talk to one more people. She also said that from the time that my fiance and I became Facebook friends she knew it and read all her posts, that she was tempted to inbox my fiance and reveal all to her. She has threatened this a few times.
Would I be able to get a court injunction forbidding any contact with my soon to be wife in any way, either via social media or otherwise?
Usually she sends me a text to tell me what she is going to do, which I believe is intended to cause me stress and anxiety.
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Law
Expert:  Buachaill replied 2 years ago.
1. This area of the law has been extensively litigated, most notably in the case of Ryan Giggs, the footballer, who sought privacy injunctions to restrain people contacting both his wife and the newspapers in relation to a relationship he had with another woman. However, I regret to say that when the injunction came to an inter partes (both sides represented) hearing, he failed in his application to restrain publication of the relationship to both his wife and to the press. Essentially, the truth will trump the right to personal privacy in situations where a relationship is concerned. The right to personal privacy is not absolute and is subject to the a public interest in the truth. This meant in that case, even the newspapers could reveal the identity of the parties involved to the world at large and not just to his wife. So I regret that you won't be able to get a court injunction in the circumstances, you have described, preventing contact between the female acquaintance you have been having an affair with and your fiance. Here, your right to personal privacy is trumped by the public interest in the truth. So I regret to say, even though you are being emotionally blackmailed by your female acquaintance, the law does not afford you a remedy by suppressing the truth of the relationship with your female acquaintance or by preventing her from contacting your wife.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Hello Sir,

Thank you for your advice. I have four follow-up questions:

1) Would it be be irrelevant to say that this acquaintance of mine and I have never been in a relationship of any sort (have never really spoken consistently over a period of time); she doesn`t even know my address! For over 5 years we have only been out casually once and I related to her as a friend which is why she knows so much about me.

2) is there any recourse in law for blackmail of this sort? Is there anything the law can do to stop someone causing this much stress and anxiety to someone else? She has known of my fiance now for over a year but as recently as August, she was still inviting me to her house but I refused as I had done many times before that. She only decided to disclose all when it was announced that I am getting married!

3) Is it relevant that I am not yet married so was not cheating on my wife-to-be?

4) Do I have sufficient grounds for harassment? The text messages are quiet distressing.

Expert:  Buachaill replied 2 years ago.
2. This is a different set of facts to those you first presented. As Keynes famously said "When the facts change, I change my mind, sir. What do you do?"
3. If you haven't been in a sexual relationship at all with this woman, you can certainly get an injunction for harassment. Even if you have been in a physical and sexual relationship with this woman, you can get an injunction for harassment under the principles outlined in Khorasandjian v. Bush (1993). In law, harassment is a civil wrong, or tort, and an injunction lies to prevent harassment. So even if you were in a relationship of any sort with this woman, you will certainly get an injunction for harassment of the type you advert to. This would be given for the asking. Essentially, it would order this woman to cease contact with you and to stop texting you amongst other things. These forms of injunctions are common as modern behaviour has lead to a surge in "stalking" particularly of the type of you are setting out. IN law, a person has a "right to be let alone" and you don't have to continue in law in any form of relationship with this woman, even if you were only friends.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Thank you Sir. It certainly doesn`t sounds like the law is so unreasonable anymore. Just one more question for clarity please:

1) My main question here is that I don`t want this woman contacting my fiance on Facebook or any other means. Is this possible? This will be a great distress to me and my wife to be. A secondary part of this question is that we are not even Facebook friends but she says she has been visiting my Facebook page and that is how she knew my fiance and that she could inbox her directly. Could the court grant an injunction on this basis forbidding her from contacting my fiance or wife and for harassing me? Personally, what has happened has happened and I can`t change that. However, we both both attend the same church so she could potentially wreck our marriage plans (which is what I believe she wants to do) and the next time she knows that I am in a relationship, she will do the same simply because I refused her advances! Is this lawful? This woman and I slept together but not as two people in a relationship and we both repented and apologised (in writing) to each other.

Expert:  Buachaill replied 2 years ago.
4. I regret to say that you cannot control contact between two other people. Your fiance would have to initiate proceedings in this situation, not you. The difficulty is that such an application would not be successful if your fiance took it as this female acquaintance is not harassing your fiance, but you. So you can apply for a harassment injunction, but you cannot control any contact between two other people. Finally, in future, never put anything in writing. Even apologies. It always has the potential to come back to haunt you.
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Ok, thank you very much.

Expert:  Buachaill replied 2 years ago.
5. You are welcome. Please RATE the answer as if you don't RATE the answer, your Expert does not get paid any of the monies you have deposited with the website.
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