Before I got to the point about the court of protection saying that you had to pay for yourself, I was thinking that as I was reading your question.
In the past, would your mother have gone on these kind of holidays herself?
I’m sorry to have to tell you that the Court of Protection are correct in what they’re saying. I appreciate all the things which lie behind this, your mother is getting no benefit from any of this money and hence, he would be better off spending it to have some time with her children. However you are only allowed to spend money in the same way that your mother would have spent it and she cannot agree to that because she doesn’t have mental capacity which is why you are a deputy.
You would be able to claim reasonable expenses but accompanying your mother on a cruise or around the world trip would not be classed as reasonable.
The ironic thing is that when your mother eventually passes away, the only 2 people who take issue with this are the two potential beneficiaries, you and your brother and as you are both an agreement to do this, it’s unlikely indeed, impossible, for either of you to raise it as an issue later when your mother eventually passes away. However that’s not the way the court look at it. The court look at it that it is your mother’s money and you are merely the custodian to do things as your mother would have done. I fully appreciate also that if your mother did have capacity, she will probably share this with you and your brother but the court do not know that. The other reason is that this money is not only to pay for your mother’s injuries but also to provide for care for the and as you don’t know how long that’s going to take or who is going to provide it, this money may be needed in full later on. I am sorry, I wish I could give you a more favourable answer.
Can I clarify anything for you?
Please don’t forget to rate the service positive. It’s an important part of the process by which experts get paid.
We can still exchange emails.
You are not going to jail. That is for a whole variety of reasons. Firstly, there was no criminal intent here, you quite reasonably believed that you could do what you were doing and you believe that you are acting in your mother’s best interest. Secondly, in the event that your mother passes away, the only complaint would be your brother and he was in agreement with this. Thirdly, there was no specific restriction in the COP documentation but it would be unreasonable to put every single scenario down.
I appreciate what you’re saying about your mother never having a holiday but it’s the disproportionate cost of the care over and above your mother’s holiday which is the problem.
You can make a formal application to the Court to have them sanction this using the very arguments that you have put with regard to the finances. Would also assist is if you had medical evidence to support what you are saying about your mother being unable to have the benefits of any other holiday such as would be requiring an aeroplane flight. You would need to show that your mother did routinely take holidays abroad, even by aeroplane.
There is another point which needs to be made and which is probably lost on the CoP staff and that is that whilst it may appear to them that you are off on a bit of a jolly funded by your mother, I am sure that looking after your mother is going to be quite intensive as you found when you tried it on your own.