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F E Smith
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Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 9339
Experience:  I have been practising for 30 years.
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My husband refuses to give up s mistress, so I was wondering

Resolved Question:

My husband refuses to give up his mistress, so I was wondering if it was worth giving him a shock by initiating divorce proceedings. How easy Is it to stop the process once it is underway should he come to his sensesWe live in England and have been married for almost 24 years
Submitted: 12 months ago.
Category: Law
Expert:  F E Smith replied 12 months ago.

You can withdraw the divorce petition at any time up to when the decree absolute is issued and remain married.

In circumstances like this, if he has not come to his senses even by the time the decree nisi is issued then there is a possibility that it won’t happen.

What you have to decide therefore is whether, in circumstances like that, you want to go ahead with the divorce or not. The issue of the divorce proceedings is likely to push the issue one way or the other.

You would complete form D11 withdraw the petition asking for an order to dismiss the petition in the matter. Your husband would write to the court a plain letter agreeing to the withdrawal.

Incidentally, it’s very difficult to petition for divorce on the grounds of adultery unless your husband admits it or he is caught in the act.

Can I clarify anything else for you?

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Best wishes.


Customer: replied 12 months ago.
Thank youI have repeatedly asked him to dump the mistress, and up to a point he has in that he hasn't seen her or been with her since I confronted him with the evidence - he does however insist on remaining in touch with her, by phone, text and email.I have told him that getting her out of our marriage is a non negotiable point for me, but he seems to want to have both of us in his life.
Customer: replied 12 months ago.
I was wondering if actually receiving the papers would make his mind up for him, I have pointed out that it's very likely I will get more than 50% of the joint assets in our circumstances, but he seems happy to coast along in this current limbo situation
Expert:  F E Smith replied 12 months ago.

The decision is yours. It could go one way or the other. It depends whether the financial aspects are important to him.

What you could do if you wanted to deal with it a bit more softly is get the divorce petition and all the paperwork filled in and show it to him and tell him that unless it stops, that will be going off to the court.

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