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Ask Dr Uzair Your Own Question
Dr Uzair
Dr Uzair, Doctor
Category: Medical
Satisfied Customers: 7967
Experience:  MBBS, FCPS (R) General Surgery. Years of experience in Emergency Medicine.
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Hi I am a 30yr old female & every time I have sex, my partner

Resolved Question:

Hi I am a 30yr old female & every time I have sex, my partner can't seem to make me climax, I have no affect when he is inside me whether going fast or slow. Is there something wrong with me and should I consider getting tested for anything?
Amanda
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Medical
Expert:  Dr Uzair replied 4 years ago.

Dr Uzair :

Hi. Welcome to JustAnswer. I shall try my best to assi\st you while you are corresponding with me.

Dr Uzair :

Can you climax or reach orgasm on your own such as during masturbation?

Dr Uzair :

Please enter chat and reply.

Dr Uzair :

Amanda, please enter chat and use "reply" to respond.

Dr Uzair :

Can you climax or reach orgasm on your own such as during masturbation?

Customer: Hi Dr Uzair. Yes I can reach orgasm when I masturbate but its not when am going inside myself.
Dr Uzair :

Is it through clitoral stimulation?

Customer: chat
Dr Uzair :

If you have a problem using the chat application then we can convert to the Q and A mode.

Customer: Hi Dr Uzair yes I can reach orgasm when I masturbate myself but thats not going inside me.
Dr Uzair :

I have received your reply. Now tell me is this only through clitoral stimulation?

Customer: yes
Dr Uzair :

Okay.

Dr Uzair :

Please do not try to rate the answer yet.

Dr Uzair :

If you can achieve orgasm through masturbation then that means that you do not have the female orgasmic disorder.

Dr Uzair :

Have you had orgasm with a different partner before?

Customer: yes
Dr Uzair :

How would you say your relationship with your current partner is?

Dr Uzair :

And have you encountered this problem as a recent one or have you never achieved orgasm with your current partner?

Customer: chat
Customer: Hi yes it is only through clitorial, not sure if your receiving any of what am putting best to email me.
Dr Uzair :

I am receiving your replies, however, I am going to convert this in to Q and A and notify you via email. You can respond in the thread. Please be patient while I send you an Information request.

Customer: yes it is through clitorial stimulation
Customer: yes it it through clitorial stimulation. best to email as not getting onto chat properly.
Customer: chat
Customer: yes
Customer: yes it is through clitorial
Expert:  Dr Uzair replied 4 years ago.

Sorry about that.

I received your replies to my earlier questions, that is you have orgasm by self stimulation and this is through clitoral stimulation but there is no climax when your current partner is inside you. I need a few more details before I can provide you with an answer.

Q. Have you ever has orgasm with the current partner?

Q. How is your relationship with your partner?

Q. Are you under any mental or physical stress?

Customer: replied 4 years ago.
Hi no never had an orgasm with my current partner, had partners in the past and none of those made me climax either. My very first boyfriend did when I was younger. Relationship at the moment is great and no stress at all.
Expert:  Dr Uzair replied 4 years ago.
Thanks for the details.

If you have had orgasms in the past and if you can orgasm with self stimulation then there is no organic pathology to be tested for, since the apparatus and mechanism seems to be working correctly. In case, there is an organic pathology then self stimulation or masturbation does not induce an orgasm either.
This is also known as situational anorgasmia, where on can experience orgasm in one situation and not in another. Like in your case, you can have an orgasm with masturbation / clitoral stimulation and not with vaginal stimulation. These situations are not usually permanently problematic.
A person who is troubled by experiencing situational anorgasmia should be encouraged to explore alone and with his or her partner those factors that may affect whether or not he or she is orgasmic, such as fatigue, emotional concerns, feeling pressured to have sex when he or she is not interested, or a partner's sexual dysfunction.
Sex therapy is warranted here. And sometimes, the key is to just relax with your partner and have a detailed discussion. Some sex therapists recommend masturbating in front your partner and tell him exactly what to do to make you orgasm. Incorporating fore-play often helps as well.
However, in the relatively common case of female situational anorgasmia during penile-vaginal intercourse, some sex therapists recommend that couples incorporate manual or vibrator stimulation during intercourse, or using the female-above position as it may allow for greater stimulation of the clitoris by the penis or pubic symphysis or both, and it allows the woman better control of movement.
I suggest that you and your partner see a sex therapist or a counsellor and develop a better understanding and communication when it comes to sexual intercourse and intimate acts.
Hope this helps.
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If you have more queries or need more information on the subject please reply back.
Best.
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