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DrRussMD
DrRussMD, Board Certified MD
Category: Medical
Satisfied Customers: 65323
Experience:  Board certified Internal medicine and Integrative medicine. Many years of experience all areas.
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How do I get over my husband cheating on me?

Resolved Question:

How do I get over my husband cheating on me?
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Medical
Expert:  DrRussMD replied 3 years ago.
Hello
What is the current situation exactly?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

I found out he's been having an on and off online affair with his colleague at work for over 2 years... he said he stopped even before I found out and he loves me and wants a new start.... but I am very very hurt and I wanna get over it but can't... what do I do?

Expert:  DrRussMD replied 3 years ago.
You have to have help in person with him and you.

The best approach is to find a PhD clinical psychologist who is trained in family therapy [most are], and sort this out.

It doesn't happen in a week, and both partners must be willing to open up.

With me so far?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Yeah but he doesn't wanna talk about it... says he made a mistake and that I rub it in his face every time I try to open the subject and he claims it's not cheating because he never told her he loves her even though he did tell her he has feelings for her and he claims it's not physical since nothing actually happened even though there were a loooot of dirty chats with descriptions of wet dreams from both sides he claims he never dreamed of her he was just humouring her and there were video chats..he swears she wasn't naked but I'm nearly 100 percent sure she was..i don't know what to do? I am losing my mind...I just had a baby with him... he says I should give him credit because he stopped on his own... is it really not cheating? I still love him sadly...


 

Expert:  DrRussMD replied 3 years ago.
I understand this situation and here is what I do
See the therapist your self.
Invite him, but tell him you are going , regardless, in the hope that you can get over this.

It will initially be up to him if he participates.

Most men will go along at this point, some will not.

Even if he does not, the therapist will teach you how to approach this in terms of communication, and help you work through your own feelings as well, which will help your power in this situation.


Hope this makes sense.

Let me know if you have more questions; use reply to expert.

Please do not forget a positive rating.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

It does count as cheating right?

Expert:  DrRussMD replied 3 years ago.
It counts as hurting you and according to some people it is cheating, but that also is what the therapist helps you define, or the two of you, but not him alone.

Let me know if you have more questions; use reply to expert.
Please do not forget a positive rating.
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