Hello. I'm Dr. Phil, licensed and practicing internist. Excellent service is my goal.
please enter chat
Hi I'm Dr. Phil
Can I ask your first name?
Nice to meet you
I'm sorry about your husband
do you think he has depression or bipolar?
He might have cyclothymia
It is a minor form of bipolar characterized by cycling moods
My recommendation would be to start out with his primary doctor
I recommend a referral to psychiatry to get assessed for an underlying mood disorder
I also recommend a counselor for both of you at the same time
that is a sign of depression in men
That is pretty impulsive behavior
could be just an impulsive guy but clearly there could be an underlying mood disorder
could be related to the drug use
No, I mean the explanation for the behavior
that being said, most drug users are self medicating underlying anxiety or depression
I would come from a place of love/caring
Just tell him that you don't care who is in the wrong...you just want to work on the relationship with him
see a counselor first and go from there
I did miss that
so what does the counselor say/
I don't understand
I am a licensed and practicing primary care physician
You had a lot of information in your post.
I read it but unfortunately I missed the part about the marriage counselor.
What did the counselor say?
was the counselor supportive of you? did they recommend he see a psychiatrist?
Okay. Let's start over.
Hang on a minute and let me read it again. Hold tight
Has he used anything other than marijuana?
or does he drink?
what about any harder drugs or alcohol?
I have to tell you that leaving like this is a sign that he is probably still using
Normal non users don't leave for days at a time
That is not normal
I don't believe that. I'm sorry
He wouldn't be leaving for 7 days at a time if he wasn't using
I think that is an excuse for him to leave
I have a LOT of experience with addiction
My own family plus as a doctor
That is classic addict behavior. Cause an argument as an excuse to leave and use
I know but what you don't realize is that is just an excuse to leave and use
Ask him to take a drug test. I bet he refuses
I know this is not easy to hear but I think deep down you know it is true
As a doctor Louise, I know a lot of men. hundreds
And I don't know any sober guys that leave for 7 days because of an argument
It doesn't happen
Ok. I am going to be brutally honest with you here Louise.
You seem not to trust me because I misread your post.
That is okay. But you are in denial.
It is very possible he is using other drugs...harder drugs...or drinking.
very possible. Mood swings, lashing out, leaving for days a time are classic behaviors of an addict
Go ahead and ask him if he will take a urine drug test. I would be willing to eat my hat if he agrees to take it on the spot.
Okay. so his behavior is different. Does that matter?
He is angry, lashing out and leaving for days at a time
I would say that is pretty classic addict behavior
Listen Louise, you have all the power here.
You can rate me negatively and tell me that I don't know what I'm talking about and ask for your money back
That doesn't matter to me.
I am here because you need someone to tell you the brutal, honest truth
And that is what I have done.
so I have done my job whether you pay me or not
Might he just be depressed? Sure, I suppose that is possible. However, I can tell that you question whether he is sober or not. Maybe even a little bit. And we can't even begin to help him unless he is perfectly clean and sober. My advice would be to ask him to take a drug test. If he refuses, then you know your answer. He is using.
Feel free to rate me however you see fit
I am more than willing to help more if you have more questions
are you there?
okay. Let me know if you need further help
Good luck Louise.