This is Dr. David
I am sorry you are having this strong need to be accepted by your wife.
you should talk to a psychotherapist about this feeling you are having
it could stem from childhood issues and not feeling accepted enough by your parents possibly.
so you could be trying to make up for that and look for stronger signs of affection or acceptance from your wife to make up for lack of acceptance during childhood.
that is one possibility.
talking with a psychotherapist would be your best option
you and your wife can also speak to a marriage counselor as well
let me know if you have questions.