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You should call the emergency right now.
Here is a link that I am giving you which will give you a list of numbers and people that you can contact right now:
How do you mean call the emergency right now
If you are suicidal right now you should either call a suicide helpline or emergency.
You need to be admitted
I have already been admitted and discharged several times as no beds
You certainly do need to be admitted again
Or at the very least you should maintain a close follow up with a psychiatrist.
Let me know if you have more questions.
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