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Dr. Ravoof
Dr. Ravoof, Doctor
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5458
Experience:  Experienced Physician in the field of Medicine and Surgery.
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I feel depressed and worry quite easily - especially when it

Customer Question

Hi I feel depressed and worry quite easily - especially when it comes to dating and relationships. I have been single for several years and currently dating someone / long distance about 265 miles. This means we don't meet often and just rely on texts and calls. My basic problem is I feel depressed and feel low on days when I don't hear from him, I constantly feel insecure that I am not his priority and I'm the only one who makes plans to meet And call or text. I don't want to seem the one who is more interested and I don't want to feel miserable either. How can I stop feeling low expecting from him and how to make sure I don't expect his communications a part of my life. I would be happy if I don't rely on his company to make me happy but it seems difficult. I basically tend to like someone more when they tend to show less interest or ignore me. I know I shouldn't be doing this but how can I avoid loving someone who ignores me or not make me a priority. And importantly I do not want to feel miserable by the person who doesn't consider me as a priority.
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Mental Health
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
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Expert:  Shantal-Mod replied 1 year ago.
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I'm Shantal and I'm a moderator for this topic.
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Expert:  Dr. Ravoof replied 1 year ago.

It is very natural for a person to miss someone he/she loves. However this should not cause a person to be depressed and anxious and lead to a low self esteem. If it does then something is amiss. Basically for the depression and anxiety as well as for the relationship counseling it is advisable for you to consult a therapist, preferably a therapist who is experienced in Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT). ACT therapy has been shown to be very effective in such conditions and will be beneficial for you. As a way to jump start your life towards healing from this suffering please read the below linked books since they are immensely beneficial. These books will help you and prepare you till your appointment with the therapist.

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Happiness-Trap-Based-revolutionary-mindfulness-based/dp/184529825X

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Act-Love-Struggling-Differences-Relationship/dp/1572246227

Take care.

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Thanks.

3 Aug 2016, 5:13 AM