Hello- Thank you for sending your question to Just Answer. My name is XXXXX XXXXX i will be giving you some encouragements and suggestions of possibilities to pursue.
So it sounds as thou this is a less than joyous divorce, shall we say.
For children, the very best thing that can happen, is if their parents can communicate and work together for the sake of the family. Unfortunately, this is not always possible. It does not serem that you and your wife are currently able to be cordial with one another. This may change. Sometimes there just needs to be time and distance. In the meantime, you need to be making a relationship with your children. the good news is you do not have to totally go through your wife to do this. talk to your lawyer..
Have you discussed visitation rights and all that?
That is so unfortunate. Can you explain to me more what you mean when you say, "it's up to them as they are told old being 13, 16 and 17 to take matters to court?" Will there be a court provision that outlines visitation?
But the court can give you an opportunity. You may want to use an opportunity to get family counseling.
Have you tried any type of therapy?
Yes, father's often have more rights in a divorce situation than they think.
The trick is to focus on your kids and how to build a relationship with them away from the mother.
They are, after all your children, too. And you will be expected to help pay for their up keep, right?
Also, what did you say about counseling? Has that been a part of the picture?
Are you having trouble staying connected? If so, I can switch this to a Q & A format.
So, what are you thinking should happen now and what questions do you have?